This Love

t w o

— • ❃ • —

"If Octavia and I are gonna get behind the blockade by dawn-"

"Shhhh."

The skin underneath Clarke's finger warmed with every new touch. Her hair. Her cheeks. Her curves. Her lips. Her. Each touch feeling just as electrical as the last. She traced the symbol suppressed against her neck, remembering every last detail of the girls body before she was concealed by the blanket of responsibility. The blanket of leadership. Her soft whispers and hushes seeping through any form discomfort. Any form of regret. Clarke felt belonged laying here, here with the one girl who made her life worth living. She knew that whenever she was with her, life was about more than just surviving.

— • ❃ • —

Clarke snapped awake to the sharp mumbles of people, she was blinking rapidly, searching and begging for the warmth to be returned. The only thing that remained was the colour green. The colour green and the gentle whispers of peace.

"Are you guys ready? They're doing an introduction talk in five minutes."

Clarke and Raven, who were huddled up together on their dorm beds after a nap, turn at the words, and Clarke freezes when she sees who's voice strikes violently against her ear drums. The mixed feeling of withdrawal and frustration ripple throughout Clarke's veins, poking and prodding against her skin with the struggle of suffocation. Finn glances down at the fatigued pair, and Clarke gapes at him, unable to make her voice work.

"We'll be down in a minute, Finn. You go ahead without us," Raven intervened, dismissing Finn with one hand and clasping Clarke's with the other, discreetly eyeing her with concern.

Before Clarke can say anything, Finn looked up at the large canvas in the corner of the room and said, "Wow. This is huge. Is this the one that has been keeping you awake for the past few months?"

Her heart pangs against her chest, tightening an already ridged knot in the pit of her stomach, knowing that it's been keeping her awake both consciously and unconsciously. Clarke's throat is too dry for words, so she just nods, and Finn smiled.

The silence is uncomfortable. The only noise erupting through the air being the solid vibrations of white noise. Every breath is heard. Every gulp is acknowledged. Raven senses this, and gently climbs out of bed to push Finn towards the door, signalling for privacy and relief.

Finn nods, "Okay." He glances past Raven to Clarke, understanding the message. "I'll just meet you guys later?"

Clarke licks her lips and stimulates her voice, "Sure. I'll see you later."

Finn smiled at Clarke, swiping his rough finger against her cheek as he shuffled closer, planting a small, icy kiss against her forehead. Clarke flinched, clasping her eyes together in attempt to make it somewhat bearable. But deep down she knew. She knew that no matter how hard she tried to bring her back into the real world, she could only feel her warmth when she slept.

"Let me guess, you dreamt of her again?" Raven questioned carefully, furrowing her eyebrows as she perched on the bed next to a very deprived looking Clarke. "Tell me about her."

Clarke felt the breath hitch in her throat, glancing towards her best friend who nodded gently, clarifying that she truly cares. She truly understands. It's nice having someone to talk about her to, and for Clarke it makes everything feel real.