Chasing After My Life. (Another cancer story)

Chapter 36

April
Sometimes fighting is the hardest thing to do when you're holding on tight trying hard not to let go. It's a lesson taught in life by different ways and honestly that's how this is for me. I can be fine and not fight for a few days and then all of a sudden I'm fighting hard to hold on,fighting hard not to let go. I love Leo and that's the only reason I do this. It's to protect him in anyway I can from the pain and hurt I know will follow when I die or when something else bad happens but we can't be prepared. Waiting for it to happen it worse so I don't wait for it I push all thoughts to the side. I knew something could be wrong but I ignored it. I was going to school today. I would be normal. It would be okay right? I mean it totally had to be okay. Why wouldn't it be okay? Technically I'm still okay at least for now,mostly okay. This is all going to be okay. I was up early,way before our alarm on Friday morning. Leo had eventually let go of my hand so I was free. He had fallen asleep holding me against him but eventually moved. I sat upright and looked at my phone quietly. It was only 5:30 in the morning. Ugh I quietly groaned and lay back down. Leo moved but didn't wake. Well I'm not going back to sleep anytime soon may as well get ready. I went into the bathroom and began to get ready. I added a touch of makeup so I didn't look as pale and sick. I was wearing one of my plain V neck long sleeved shirts and my dark skinny jeans. I slid on my grey converse and quietly slipped downstairs. To my surprise it was 6:15 and Sarah was already down there to meet me. Shhh....she motioned with her finger for me. I looked over to find Leo's brother Adam on the couch asleep. It was early. She handed me a mug of warm tea and grabbed her mug of coffee. She motioned for me to follow her. I followed her outside onto the porch swing. Hey, I just wanted you to know if you changed your mind about school today it is okay with me,I understand and I'm glad you're up early so we can talk beforehand but I am leaving it completely up to you,I have to go into work around noon,Sarah said. No I want to go,I want to be normal now that I am mostly normal,I have to do this,me too though I wasn't expecting it,I replied. We just sat there for a while watching as the sun made its rise over the horizon. After 30 minutes we went inside to get breakfast. She made waffles with powdered sugar and fruit. I ate and was finished just as Leo walked in. Good morning,I said. Good morning,he said and walked over to me,gently giving me a kiss. He went and fixed his plate for breakfast. Once he was done it was time to leave. I drove us this morning. We were alternating days. I was dreading the day when I'd have to move back home after being with them so long. It's already been 2 years. We got to school and I parked. We walked in together holding hands. I was surprised when I walked in to find everyone had gathered in the main office. Hanging on the wall was a banner that read,"Welcome Back April!" Another read,"Take that cancer." I put my hand over my mouth in surprise. Welcome Back,they all shouted. I began to cry tears of happiness. Leo hugged me and smiled as he saw my surprise. At least it was a Friday. Okay lovebirds,hate to break you apart but class starts in two minutes,come on April we have class together I'll walk with you we will see him later,Beth said. I hugged her next and we walked down the hall to our first class. Leo smiled at me as I walked away. I met them both before lunch and asked how long they kept it secret. Oh only a few days,when you were out in the hospital he texted me knowing you'd want to come back and so we wanted to welcome you and do what we could so the whole school came together and this was our plan. I---I don't know what to say,I said. I love you both,I said and hugged them. We know we love you too,they said. After lunch the rest of the day past in a blur. After school we went out to my car. Can I drive I have one last surprise up my sleeve,Leo asked. Sure I guess,where are we going,I asked. It's a surprise,he said. I climbed up front. He started to drive. We were on the road for about 30 minutes when I fell asleep. Okay come on sleeping beauty,he said. I blearily opened my eyes. Where are we,I asked. Just a little vacation,he said and offered me his hand. He opened the trunk and I was surprised to find both of our suitcases in the back. When did this happen,I asked. Before mom picked us up from the hospital,we've been planning it for a while,he answered. Just think of it as the perfect weekend getaway,he added. I love you,I said and grabbed his hand as he handed me my suitcase and we walked inside. Inside was a gallant hallway leading to the living room. It had a high ceiling with cabin like walls and a crystal chandelier. Upstairs were three bedrooms. We walked into the biggest one. Oh my god,Leo, this is amazing,I said. I know,this will always be my favorite spot because it will be my favorite memory,it's extra special being here with you,he said. I'm gonna get changed quick cause I smell like school,I'll be right back,I said. I walked into the bathroom which was ginormous and was stocked with almost everything. I slid into my pajama pants and shirt. It was a bit chilly so I slid on my oversized sweatshirt. I walked out after I was finished and had washed my makeup off and brushed my teeth and hair. Leo was sitting on the bed waiting. He stood up. I just walked up to him and hugged him tight. We stood there for several minutes. I was suddenly really tired and the thought of sleep was welcoming. Are you tired,he asked me. Yes,I mumbled into his chest. He picked me up and laid me in bed. I was about to close my eyes to sleep when he started walking away. No,Leo,stay here with me tonight,I mumbled as I grabbed for his shirt. Okay,I'm coming just let me turn the light off,he said. He did and then he climbed in next to me. Next, there was peaceful sleep. I was overjoyed to be here with Leo as he wrapped me into his arms and pulled me close while I slept. I had the whole weekend alone with him. I'm not sick,it's amazing being able to do things like this.