Stuck In Love (COMPLETED)

chapter-4

Sophie Esinberg's POV

It has been two days since that incident happened. Interaction Sessions for the nominees are still going on but I haven't attended any one of them after the incident.

I always told myself that it won't be a problem facing Raymond again. I always thought that I could control my emotions and act as if nothing happened. But I couldn't be more wrong. Every time I see him all those memories come back and they make me cry. Even if Raymond and I are in the same room my emotions intensify and I lose control. It is becoming harder and harder for me every passing day to remain calm in front of him. I cannot. Every time I see him my heart starts beating faster and something inside my stomach starts exploding. I get nervous. About what, even I don't know.

His eyes. They have always been the ones to communicate with me. I always felt this bond between me and Raymond because his eyes use to speak volumes about his feelings and I could read them. I could see the sorrow, the pain, the regret every time I look into his eyes.

But I don't know what to believe anymore. At once I use to believe him, his eyes. Although it has been seven years yet somewhere deep down inside me I know that I still love him. No matter how much I try to convince others or myself.

I always get this feeling that I should talk to him. For once at least but what stops me from doing that is fear and my self-respect. I fear that maybe this all could be an illusion. Maybe Raymond actually wanted to just use me and then leave. I am not going to sweet talk to someone who used me anyway.

So finally I thought that it would be best for me not to go in front of him. I don't want him to know that I am weak and he is my weakness.

So here I am sitting alone inside Starbucks having no one to talk with. My plan sucks I know. I was admiring the beautiful sky which was turning from blue to mellow pink as the sun neared the horizon.  The sky was clear and so were the shades of orange and pink spread in the sky as if a painter has splashed colors in the sky. The air was windy enough to fan my face whenever the entrance gate of Starbucks opened.

I did not realize someone's presence behind me until the person shook my shoulder from behind. With a loud gasp, I turned around to look at the person.

" Penny for your thoughts?" Dany asked with a smirk on his lips and a smile made its way on mine as I took in his appearance.

"Oh my god! Dany what are you doing here? Weren't you suppose to be in Miami or something?" I asked with an amused look on my face.

" Hello to you too, Kim and Surprise!!"  he said as he took a seat in front of me.

" What are you actually doing here? I can't believe you came -"

"Just to attend your Award Function." he finished my sentence.

" Thank you so much, Dany for coming."

" Well, I had to. After all, it's my future wife we are talking about."

As soon as these words escaped his mouth my smile faded. I am not dating Daniel. I never did but our mothers want us to get married since we are childhood best friends. I talked to mom about this but she said it's for the best.

I don't know what to say. It's not that I don't love Daniel. I do but I think I am not ready yet for all this. Daniel was with me through my thick and thin and I am grateful to him for that but I cannot just marry him like this.

Not when I know that I am still in love with someone else.

I cannot do this to Daniel. He deserves much better. He deserves to be loved and for a fact, I know that I cannot give him that.

I wanted to talk to him about this but I just couldn't. 

The smile he had on his face when our elders told us about their decision, I couldn't snatch that. After all, he has been with me since forever. He helped me to move on seven years ago. He helped me with everything he could.

But I cannot betray him either. I have to talk it out with Daniel.

"About that. I wanted to talk to you."

"About what our marriage?" he asked with a perky smile on his face and a glint of happiness inside his eyes.

I took a deep breath before continuing.

Oh boy, this is going to be hard.

" Dany you know that I am not ready for this"

Not after I kissed Raymond

" I still need to figure out some things. " I replied while gazing down at the floor as guilt consumed me.

"Okay. So Kim just answer this. Do you love me or not?" he asked with hurt clear on his face.

"I-I...." I couldn't speak anymore. I froze.

Thankfully someone interrupted us. I titled my head only to find out the person to be Noah.

What on earth is happening in my life today?

"Sophie?" Noah inquired.

I smiled and nodded before standing up and giving him a friendly hug. I asked him to join us and soon we started chatting. Although Dany was glancing at me once in a while just to remind me that we have some unfinished business to deal with and I was trying to pretend I didn't understand his gesture.

" Anyhow, how is Raymond Sophie?" Noah asked and I stiffened at this.

" Umm...we are no longer in touch. uuh..we- we broke up the long time ago,"I replied with hesitation as I was trying to avoid any eye contact with Daniel. Daniel does not like to talk about Raymond. He always said I was mourning over a guy who used me and it was of no use.

"ohh...sad. He was a keeper, you know. He truly cared about you"  said Noah which made me confused since he never met Raymond. So how could possibly know about this?

I saw Dany's fist tightened and I knew that he was beyond angry by now but I couldn't resist asking.

" Umm..how do you know this? I mean y-you never met him right?" I asked.

"Ohh..No. I did. After the internship, he contacted me and asked me if I could get a photocopy  of your project."  He replied which made me more curious.

"Okay.. I guess that is enough about Raymond. Sophie lets go. You are getting late." Said Danny as he stood up from his seat leaving me and Noah in confusion.

But I was hell-bent on finding out the reason.

"What but why?" I asked not moving from my seat.

"To apply for the scholarship, idiot. He said he can get it approved by Higher Authorities and then apply for the scholarship under your name, " he replied and I sat there shocked. My jaw was hanging open and I had lost my ability to speak or even think.

After seeing my facial expressions Noah raised his eyebrows questioning me and when I did not speak anything he said

"I hope you do realize that you got into Stanford University because of him. "

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Happy New Year !