BENJI. (a guide to being normal)

Kris Visits Benji

“Benji? Hello? Are you awake?”

Benji’s eyes opened and then closed again. He let out a small breath and forced his eyes open. “What’s today?” He turned his head slightly to the person in the chair beside him. He knew immediately who it was—he only knew one round person with buckteeth and a pleasant face.

“It’s a Tuesday,” Copper replied. “You slept all last night and until five o’clock today. You need anythin’?”

“No.”

“Listen, I’m sorry about this whole Fiona thing and job problem, and all. I don’t think I’ve been very supportive of you.”

“Ah, Copper, don’t go on like that. You were excited and wanted me off your back, I understand.”

Copper shrugged. “I know, but it still wasn’t nice of me to throw you off like that. I should’ve encouraged you to stick with the promotion if it was offered, or, at least given us more time before I moved in.”

Benji turned his face to the warm sun and smiled faintly. “It’s all right, mate. You deserve everything you’ve gotten.”

“Yeah, but you’ve been going through hard times. Especially with being avoided by your parents, and this thing with Kris; I don’t want to add onto your troubles, you know?” Copper scooted the chair up against the bed and pulled out a bag of Galaxy chocolates. “Got your favourites.”

“Thanks, mate.” But Benji still didn’t light up as much as Copper wanted him to.

“Is it Kris?”

“Why can’t I ever catch a break?”

Copper’s mouth closed in thought and he drummed his fingers on the metal frame of the bed. “Well, you know I don’t exactly believe what you do, but, you once told me that you’re never given more than you can handle, and with faith, anything is possible. So, you’re not stuck, Benji, there’s a way out.”

“But where? Where is this ‘way out’? I feel like I missed it somewhere between ages eleven and seventeen.”

Standing up, Copper gave his friend a light pat on the head. “It’s not lost, Benji. You know I’ve always believed in you.” In a brotherly gesture, Copper tapped the part of his chest that lay over the heart with his fist. “You get better, all right? I’ll catch you later.” He left the room, closing the door behind him.

Benji’s eyes followed him down the hallway and predicted him to enter the lift just like he had done the last time he had visited him, but instead, Benji was surprised by an unforeseen visitor. There, stepping off the lift was her. Kris Madison. She was alone, as well. He watched in perked curiosity as the two chatted for awhile. He saw Copper point towards his room, making him dodge the faraway finger, but he knew Kris had already seen him. The woman smiled at Copper and made her way to the room. Before Benji could make up his mind on whether or not he wanted to see her, the nurse let her in.

“Hello, Benji,” she said quietly. “Copper called and told me. You doing all right?”

Benji hummed a positive reply. “I’m fine, and you?”

She took a seat beside him and placed her handbag on her lap. “I’m good, I’m so glad you’re all right.”

“You are?”

“Of course.”

Picking at the threads on the covers, Benji stuttered, “I’m really sorry about shoving you out the other day and about Shannon and everythin’. I just, I don’t know. I’m sorry for being a selfish prat and just being so stupid and getting myself into these things.”

“It’s okay,” Kris said sweetly. “We started off funny, but not in a bad way.”

Benji laughed at himself and shook his head at the conversations he was having in his head. “It was a bad start. I feel like I’ve gotten in the way of your life, and I didn’t even search for a job agent properly, it was by random. I don’t know.” Benji’s voice trailed off and he looked away from her for a moment to recollect his thoughts. “I just don’t like bothering people.”

Kris smiled softly and leaned back in the chair. “You don’t bother me.”

Benji’s eyes widened in surprise, he never thought she’d say that to him.  As he stared at her, captured by her overall presence, he came upon the decision that she would make a fantastic zombie hunter. He could tell by the flexion of her biceps and broad shoulders that she worked out frequently. She was neither too tall, nor too short, the perfect height to take down a zombie barehanded. He could also tell she had a sensible way about her; always thinking before she spoke.

“What you thinking about?” Kris asked, her voice, though quiet and civil, sliced through his imagination and brought him back to their earlier conversation.

Jumping into talking so not to appear he had been out of it, he replied, “I know, I mean, I’m sure I don’t know now. I just feel like if you get to know me and realise that I’m so insecure about everything, then, I will become a bother. I’m a bother to my parents, my friends, I just think. Don’t worry about it, it’ll work out, I guess.”

The woman remained silent for awhile, mauling over thoughts in her head. Her foot bounced at a steady beat as she tossed the words inside her mind. Slowly, and very carefully so not to offend, she said, “Maybe, assuming people hate you will hide the people who love you.”

“What do you mean?”

Before Kris could reply, a knock sounded at the door and a nurse stepped in with a small bottle of medications. Kris politely stood up and gave her an expression meaning her visit was over.

“Bye, Benji, I’ll stop by later during the week, maybe during an hour for lunch. Take care, okay?”

Trying desperately to find another conversation for her to stay, Benji called out, “Um, what about my job? Will you tell them about me?”

Kris eagerly spun around, banging into the closing door in the process. But that didn’t stop her from answering. “Of course, they’ll understand. Maybe I can come in with paperwork and stuff, does that sound good?”

“It does,” Benji said with a growing smile, which she returned in a magical way. The nurse stepped in front of him to write something on the clipboard and when she moved away, Benji had just enough time to see the lift doors close.