Nightspell || Michael Clifford

Chapter 22

I sighed, looking through the threshold of Michael's cabin.
It was pouring rain outside, meaning that I had to stay inside to prevent my leg brace from getting wet.
Obviously it could handle a little bit of rain, but the only reason it was still functioning now is because we kept smudging coconut oil over the joints.
So I stayed inside while Michael went out to do his rounds and get us dinner for tonight.
I had planned on taking a "shower" today, but the rain seemed to put my entire life on hold.
I was sitting on the floor, just out of reach of the rain with one of Michael's books in my lap. I had taken my leg brace of since I didn't need it when I was sitting down and I was just staring at the beach.
The rain ticking on the roof of the cabin was calming in a way. It seemed to allow my brain to slow down and think clearly. But that didn't make anything any easier.
I had to decide whether I wanted to stay here or go home and I had to make this decision today.
Not because Michael had to call in his supplies today, but because I needed a day after I had made my decision to make sure I made the right one.
I had been weighing the pros and cons of both options all day long and I was slowly driving myself to insanity.
On one hand, I wanted to stay. I loved the serenity Nightspell had and I loved that I didn't have to live up to any expectations. The pros of staying would be exactly that. No expectations to live up to, no people to disappoint, no more people judging me. The cons would be that I wouldn't be able to see Alex. I wouldn't see him grow up anymore, I wouldn't be able to help him escape from our parents. I wouldn't be able to see my friends anymore, I wouldn't be able to tell them I was still alive.
And though there were more cons than pros to staying, the pros felt bigger, they felt worth the cons.
I could ask Frank to tell my friends and family I'm still alive, and if Alex ever needed any help with our parents, maybe he could write me and he'd know how to deal with them the next time he found himself in a similar situation.
The pros of going home were basically the opposite of the cons of staying here. I would be able to see Alex, and I would be able to help him out and see him grow up. I would be able to see my friends and tell them about the things I've been through over the last couple of weeks. And on top of that I'd be able to take a nice, long, warm shower. I would be able to wash my hair and wear my own clothes.
The cons being that, although it sounded good right now, living with my parents wasn't easy. I'd have to continue to find a way to deal with their disrespect when it came to me being colorbind. I'd have to start figuring out a new way to dress myself without it looking weird in the end. And the biggest con of all, I might come home to an empty, deserted house.
They might not have made it off the ship on time. They might have died before they got to safer grounds.
I really didn't want to open our front door only to be greated by dust and darkness.
At least not without being prepared for it.
But if I stayed here it would also take another month or so before I had my answer. One more month before I knew whether or not my parents and brother were still alive.
'I'm back!' I suddenly heard Michael's voice from outside.
I looked up, rain still pouring down as Michael showed up at the door, his shoes, jeans and shirt all completely soaked and dirty from the mud he had had to walk through.
He carefully stepped over my legs, taking of his shoes only to find out that his socks were soaked too.
'God I hate the rain.' He mumbled, attempting to dry his face with his wet t-shirt.
I wasn't sure what to say. I had been so stuck in my thoughts that it kind of felt like half my brain was still there while the other half was trying to pull me back to the cabin I was sitting in.
'What have you been up to?' Michael asked as he grabbed the empty waterbottles from the corner of the room and walked back outside.
He placed them in the sand just outside the door, made a funnel with a leaf and walked back inside.
'Not much,' I replied vaguely. 'how was the island?'
'It's good, didn't see anything strange. Are you just reading that notebook again or did you not move from this page since I left a while ago.' Michael asked, a small smile on his face as he took of his shirt and jeans and laid them out on the floor.
I tried not to stare too much as he walked over to his bag of clean clothes but it proved to be very difficult seeing as he was walking around in just his underwear.
Which, might I add, was completely soaked as well.
'I didn't move from the first page.' I told him honestly.
Michael shivered and pulled the dry shirt over his head before turning around and making his way back to me.
The only jeans he had were the ones that were currently soaking the floor.
'Is it that boring?' Michael smiled, taking the notebook out of my hands and shifting through the pages.
'No not at all.' I grinned. 'I was going to read it but then I started thinking.'
'About what?' Michael asked, though I was pretty sure he knew the answer to that question.
'About staying here or leaving.' I replied, sighing in defeat.
Michael nodded slowly. 'Well can I help you with that? Do you have any questions you'd like answers to or things that aren't clear?'
I thought about that for a moment, before nodding my head.
'IF I decide to stay here, and my family happens to still be alive, can I still talk to them?' I asked.
Michael nodded almost instantly. 'You can, but you do it the old fashioned way. You write to them. And every month, when the boat gets here with our things, you give the letter to Frank and he'll personally deliver them to the address you put on it. And obviously, if someone were to write back, he'll make sure you get that letter the next month.'
'So, If I were to get a letter from my brother, I'd have to wait an entire month before I can send my reply?' I frowned.
Michael shook his head. 'No, the letter is the first thing he'll give to you. You read it, than write back right away. And by the time his boat is empty and re-filled with things we have too much of here, you'll probably have finished writing and he'll take it back to Australia.'
'So what happens if I'm not done writing yet?'
'Nothing happens.' Michael shrugged. 'He just waits for you to be done. He's a good man. I don't even think he gets paid for this. He just likes to take long trips with his boat and if he can help someone out in the progress he'll happily agree to it.'
I nodded, thinking of my next question. 'What if next month I decide I do want to go back home?' I ask.
Michael smiled and looked at me, taking my hand and pulling it in his lap as if to reassure me of something.
'I'm not some kind of weird abducter. If you want to leave next month you can. Not going to lie, I'll probably be a little sad to see you go but if you want to go, you can. You're not obligated to do anything. You can make your own decision.'
I nodded once more. 'And what if my family is still alive? What if this guy goes back to Australia and finds out they're all okay. Do I have to wait another month to actually get that answer?'
Michael didn't answer right away, he stared out in front of him for a second. As if he didn't want to tell me the truth but he knew he had to.
'No.' He said, 'We can ask Frank to call in a week or two weeks. However long he thinks it'll take to figure out if they're okay not. He does have his own life though, his own family to take care of, so it's not going to be less than week. But we'll make sure it won't take a month either.'
I looked out the door, my brain felt like it was about to explode. A whirlwind of reasons and explainations was going around in my head, but one thing stood out very clearly.
I could leave whenever I wanted to.
If next month, I'd want to live in a real house with an actual door, I'd be able to.
'Okay,' I said after what felt like a year. 'I think I'll stay for a little bit longer.'
Michael's smile grew bigger, practically taking over his entire face as he engulfed me in a hug.
I laughed, my arms automatically wrapping themselves around his waist.
'Thank you.' He said softly. 'I promise you won't regret it.'