Chapter 23

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Louis woke up with the biggest hangover he could've ever had. The bed next to him was empty, but he still could smell the shame and disgust he was with himself.

The first thing he'd seen when he woke up was the stars on the ceiling and it made his heart ache. His breath smelt of vodka and stale cigarettes and his body smelt of sweat.

Vivid memories of Harry and the conversation they'd had last night still lingered in his mind, and he wished it didn't.

What Harry said hurt him a lot. He can't stand seeing Harry force himself to loving a guy who might not be who he says to be to the lad. The whole situation was just fucked up and Louis was starting to suspect something was going on.

He dragged himself out of bed and straight to the showers. He scrubbed all the sweat and all the regret off of him and slipped into a new pair of clean cloths.

He didn't bother eating any breakfast, knowing his mum would be giving him one of her disappointed looks.

He doesn't blame her though. He too would be giving him nasty looks. Louis laid on the bed and stared at the plastic stars.

His nails were chipping off and the nail polish that Harry brought over was still on the counter with other colors.

Louis scratched off the left over paint and started to re paint them with the mint color. He liked it better when Harry was here to hold his hand still as he painted the lads nails with the bright color.

He was already missing the deep conversations they had and the cuddling and the jokes they said to each other.

Louis missed Harry as he would read his journal on the floor and wouldn't tell Louis what was in there.

He couldn't help it but to feel as if he ruined everything with Harry. The lad just gave him so many mix emotions and mixed signals he doesn't know whether Harry knew himself what he was doing.

But as he looked back to it, Louis was Harry's only friend, but why? There are plenty of other gays in the school, and people who support them, so why was Louis the only friend Harry had?

The missing classes was a mystery as well. There was no valid reason to just miss a week worth of classes.

When Harry had came over to Louis house all lost and broken, the lad still has yet to figure out why Harry came.

There was just too many things and questions running in Louis' mind, he couldn't just find the right answers to them.

He is a bit suspicious to why Harry wouldn't just leave Jace. It's really that simple.

When your boyfriend cheats on you, you break up. When you don't love this guy, you break up. Louis just didn't get it, but he never will because he wasn't in a relationship.

Louis felt his cuts itching a bit, but he ignored that feeling because he knew it was just trying to get him to break again.

He won't be doing this again. After having Harry talk to him like that, he doesn't know how he will be able to handle it if Harry decided to just walk away.

Although it was just Harry's first time seeing him cut himself, that could always be enough to set someone off.

Harry didn't seem to be like that though. He cares about Louis, so he wouldn't just leave the lad there to suffer. He would clean his wounds and talk to him as if this wasn't bad.

It really is bad, but Harry didn't make it seem like it is. He called Louis a hero and heroes can lose themselves.

There was a soft knocking on the door. Louis wanted to shout and tell them to go away, but he didn't have to heart to do that right now. It was like he'd gone soft.

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