Letters To Autumn (2016)

31

Dear Autumn,

Ah, this is my last letter. Weird. It feels like I blinked and October was over. Today was Halloween, obviously, and I think this was the first year I wasn't at home for most of the day, what with play practice. But I still had so much fun! In my political science class we all sat in a circle and lit candles and told ghost stories, and then before play practice started two friends and I had the auditorium to ourselves, and we left the lights off and told spooky stories and goofed off on stage together.

This is entirely unrelated, but my cat is laying on my stomach right now and he's warm and soft and I love him more than life itself. I thought you should know that, Autumn.

Where will I be when you come around next year, Autumn? Will I be away at the college I dream of? Things will be so different next time you see me. Will I be that much different? I hope so. I hope you see someone happy and confident, smiling and sure of what she can accomplish.

I know I've talked a lot about mental health this month, Autumn, but I want you to know that I know I can be happy. Looking back through this month, I'm realizing how lucky I am. I was given a really good life, Autumn. I'm happy with it; I just need to be happy in it. Which is something I can work on. I can grow. I can blossom into something over the next year, something even you can't knock down and kill.

I'd like to mention Emina in this letter, Autumn. I love her so much. I've never had someone make me believe in my writing more. She leaves so many nice comments about my writing which make me cry and feel like I'm doing something right. I hope I can publish something someday and dedicate to her, because her support has meant so much to me. Not only does she make me feel great about my writing, but she makes me feel great about who I am. She makes me feel like a good person. Send her all the happiness and good things over the next year, please. She deserves it so much.

Thank you for being such a great companion this year. I promise to be here next year, no matter what's going on. I'll be here if you still want me. I hope you do.

Till next year, Autumn.