10/30/16
10:21 PM
Dear Strawberry,
I'm sorry
I know this year has been difficult for you
It has been for me, too
We're changing, and I know that's hard to do without each other
Because it can feel like I'm changing away from you
But that isn't true
It's just that I've changed in ways
I can't explain
To say it plain:
I can't feel the same way about you that I used to
I can't be a simple friend anymore
No matter how desperately I wish to be
It just strangles me
This silence we've become
I could speak into the void
But my echo would come back and that would hurt more that this thick wall of quiet so I will keep un-speaking to you
And hoping things will go back to
The way they used to
Be . . .
I don't know if you noticed but
I've been kinder this year
To you, at least
Because I feel like I know you less
I can't make fun of you
And joke with you
And about you
The way I used to anymore.
But honesty
From you to me
Is too painful to even fathom
I can think of myself saying the words I need to say
To you
And it sickens me, that image does, because I'm afraid of telling the truth
God, I can't even write it here
I'm too scared
I wonder
I wonder if you are too.
You aren't though because you've told me things that mean you don't know me the way I wish you knew me and I will never know you the way I wish I could know you.
You're just a strawberry, I'm sorry, polished and pretty on the outside, but bleeding out into oblivion when you are split open.
Your Friend,
Never
(PS: If you ever read this, you know my "secret", I think. You should, because I told you. But you won't acknowledge it. So I guess we never will.)
YOU ARE READING
Letters To Throw In Fires
PoetryWords are only kindling if they're never read But they become fire in your ears. You can read my letter and start flames inside your head Or throw them in the fire and live in ease instead. Cover by @sereneur
