Testing

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I've been dating Mark for almost two years now and I've been living with him for almost the entire time. It has been a dream. He's the ideal boyfriend...we've been kicking the idea of marriage around lately...we've decided that we want to get married, just not right this minute. It's not us, our relationship is perfect. It's work. He's so busy, and honestly, I'm about to get busy with work too. I don't do YouTube, it's not my thing...I'm just wrapping up nursing school. As you can imagine, you can frequently hear Mark shouting 'shut up, nurse' around the house. It's getting to the point that abandoning my BSN in favor of a different degree just might be in order. It seems like nothing can derail us. We're just too perfect together. I've never been happier.

It was early in the morning. I woke up to an empty bed. That was common. Mark gets up early to record so he has a good portion of the day to spend doing other things. Working out, spending time with me, all that stuff. I sat up and stretched, feeling...ill. I passed it off as being really tired. I dragged myself out of bed and took a shower, trying to wake up. I felt so fatigued...I had been for a week or so now. When I was done, I went downstairs and much to my surprise Mark was sitting at the table eating a bagel. "Hi." I said, walking past him. "Morning (y/n)." he chirped back. I really wasn't hungry, I just wasn't feeling so hot. I braced myself on the counter, feeling nausea bubbling up. "Are you okay, babe?" Mark asked, looking concern. I didn't move or say anything. Without much warning, I turned my head and heaved my guts into the sink. Oh no. I was sick. I hate being sick... I ran some water and looked over at Mark who had obviously lost his appetite. "Babe, are you alright?" he asked again. I shook my head. "I woke up feeling weird...I guess I'm sick." I said weakly. I turned the tap off and dragged myself back to bed. "I'm coming (y/n)." Mark said, chasing me up the stairs. "Don't you have to record?" I asked. "Yeah, but it can wait a bit longer. I have to make sure you're okay." I let Mark escort me to bed. "Do you need anything?" he asked. "I need to feel better." I said. Mark rubbed my forehead. "Get some sleep. I'll come upstairs and watch a movie with you later." I tumbled into the blankets. I felt weird...the nausea had subsided and I felt fine, outside of being really tired. This didn't feel like the flu. It didn't feel like anything I'd ever felt before. I passed it off as a weird bug of sorts. There was no way it could be anything else, could it? I watched Mark leave our room. I laid in bed staring at the ceiling for what felt like an eternity. I was so tired, but I couldn't sleep. I sighed. "What's wrong?" Mark asked sitting down. I hadn't realize how much time had lapsed. "Nothing...just still don't feel well." I said. Mark rubbed my shoulders and dragged a hand down my breast. I sat up. "Ouch!" I said, rubbing my chest. "What happened?" Mark asked, concerned. "I'm not sure...it just felt like someone poked my boob..." I was getting confused now. "Sorry, mabye I scratched you a bit." Mark said. I ignored him, I was distracted by whatever twinge of pain it was that I had just felt. I tried piecing the puzzle together. Nausea, vomiting, fatigue, and sensitive breasts...no way. Mark and I used protection. We both were very clear about not wanting to be parents for quite a while longer than this. The look of surprise and fear must've been on my face because Mark immediately picked up my hand and wanted to know what was wrong. "N-nothing. I just really don't feel well. I'm gonna lay back down now." I said. "What about movie night?" Mark whined. "Put whatever movie in you want to see. I'm gonna try to sleep." I said. Yeah right, as if. Sleeping at a time like this? Not gonna happen. I laid there awake for the rest of the evening and the rest of the night. 

The next morning, once again I woke up to an empty bed. I ran to the bathroom, barely making it. Two consecutive days of vomiting with NO fever and numerous other symptoms of pregnancy. That in and of itself was very telling. I hurried to get dressed. I snagged my keys and drove to the nearest drug store. Ugh, pregnancy tests are so expensive. I thought, noting the ridiculous prices. Why is everyone staring at me? It's not like I'm 14... I hurried to make my purchase, and left, cradling the plastic bag in my hands. I stuffed the receipt and the tests into my purse. I could NOT let Mark see. I didn't know what he'd do. I feared that he'd be angry with me or worse, leave. I dashed into the house and went into our bathroom, locking the door behind me. I took out one of the tests and read the instructions. It was pretty simple. I held my breath, thinking that doing so was going to give me the result I wanted. The human mind is funny sometimes. I set the test on the counter and waited that painful 2 minutes. I picked it up...positive. My heart stopped. I looked at the test about 10 times to make sure I had read it properly. It was definitely positive. I read the instructions again. It said that the best time to test was first thing in the morning. That's what I did. I took the other one. Positive. I breathed shakily, tears beginning to form. I couldn't hide this from Mark. He'd find out sooner than later one way or another. I wrapped my tests in toilet paper and carried them with me, sticking them under the mattress. I sat on the bed and cried for a minute. Mark must've heard me because he came into the room. "Do you feel that bad?" he asked. I bit my lip, tears still streaming down my face. "Yeah." I squeaked out. "Aw, baby..." Mark said, wrapping his arm around me. "You'll be okay." he said, wiping my tears. "It's just a bug." I wanted so badly to blurt out that it was not a bug, but I couldn't find the right words. I remembered that the box for the tests was in the bathroom in plain view. I darted into the bathroom and ran the water, trying to make Mark think that I was hiding 'sounds' from him. I tore the box to shreds and wet the pieces down. I tossed them into the toilet and flushed it. Whew. Evidence gone. I sat back down on the bed. "(Y/N), you are acting a bit strange." I felt my blood run cold. "H-how?" I asked. "You just are. I can't put my finger on it, but something is off about you right now." I gulped a bit. "No, I just don't feel well." I insisted. "I know, but you're just acting off." I felt nervous. I saw that a piece of toilet paper was sticking out from under the mattress. It reminded me that no matter how much I tried to hide things, Mark was going to find out. I sighed. "Mark...get up for a second." I said, standing. He stood up. I pulled the tests out from under the mattress, discarding the toilet paper. I handed both tests to Mark, and immediately turned away, tears forming all over again. "(Y/N)..." Mark said. "Are these real?" I looked at him and nodded. He looked at me for a long time before finally letting tears of his own fall. "This is so great." he said, hugging me tightly. "Great?" I questioned. "I thought that we said we weren't ready?" He let go of me, a huge grin on his face. "(Y/N) we were planning on waiting until after being married awhile, but life had other plans. It's okay. Money is no problem, housing is no problem, yeah- the timing isn't what we both anticipated it being, but it's okay. You and I both want a family, and now we're getting one...or maybe two?" He laughed. "I have to call my mom...I have to call your mom...I have to call everyone!" I smiled a bit seeing Mark so excited. It was a huge weight off of my shoulders. "Call away..." I said, sitting down. "What's wrong?" he asked, looking worried. "I feel sick again." I said, swallowing hard. "I guess I'll have to get used to that." Mark said, sitting down with me, waiting to see what was going to happen.

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