Where do I begin? I've never written before, but now it seems like the right thing to do. He gave me this, this little pink typewriter. It was his grandmother's and he wanted me to have it, so how could I refuse? The answer is I couldn't, it's the s...
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I was never the type of girl that had great social skills, I was much more comfortable being alone and in my own little bubble of protection. Only once before had I let a man into my life, I had given him my all and he turned out to be a lying cheat. He was my everything and I was only another piece of a.ss he decided to use that year.
So it wasn't easy for me to let Jacob in. It took time for me to get use to the idea of having a boyfriend again, and it took even longer for me to get use to talking to him openly. I was a nervous wreck every time he would call me, and our dates were the worst because of me. Jacob was always a gentleman though, he always put up with my anxiety and stuck with me even when I didn't want him to.
Somehow he managed to break down my walls, brick by brick he took them down gently. And once they were down I realized that I never needed to protect myself from Jacob, Jacob was my protection he was always there to prevent me from falling into fear.
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"I was waiting for you, I just didn't think you'd be here this early, we stayed up pretty late last night." Jacob says to me as he emerges from the back of the café, a goofy smile dancing on his lips, and a twinkle in his eyes. He looks so happy and what I'm about to say next might ruin that... oh I'm a horrible person. "Are you okay Ana?"
I nod "I uhm, I don't really remember anything from last night."
"That's because I gave you some pain meds, your face had become too painful and it was making you miserable. They put you right to sleep... how is your face by the way?" slowly his hands come up and cup my face, his thumb gently grazing over my bruise. "Doesn't look that bad, but your lip may need stitches-"
"So we didn't, we didn't sleep together?" I whisper
A small smirk raises on the corner of his mouth and he stifles a chuckle "No Ana, scouts honor. Your dignity is still intact. I only stayed to make sure you were okay and once I knew you were, I locked up for you and left."
I sigh in relief, making him finally burst with laughter. "Okay good- I, I mean- maybe in the future but not- oh gosh... I'm going to shut up now"
Once I'm done my stuttering rant, Jacob looks at me and smiles "You don't have to be nervous around me Ana, you know that. I'd never do anything to hurt you."
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At the time Jacob's words were just that, words. I knew he was a nice guy right in that moment, but we had just met. You only get to see a person's true colors after you've known them for a long time. But for some reason I wanted to spend more time with Jacob, I wanted to know him better, heck I wanted him to know me better. I wanted him to understand why I was so nervous around him. And I wanted to understand his reason for liking me as much as he did, and not running for the hills once I started to become a babbling idiot.
That morning he offered again to take me out on a date, he had something magnificent planned. A night underneath the stars, just me and him, a couple of drinks, and a funny movie. Of course I was reserved and tried to give him some boring excuse as to why I couldn't go, but once I saw the desperation on his face I gave in. Our first date was wonderful and I'm so glad I didn't let fear get the best of me.
