The Wrong Choices

14. "I'm not buying you a fucking unicorn"

Chapter Fourteen.

I barely get a chance to talk to Dad on Sunday and Monday. There's so many people coming in and out of our house that Dad barely even gets a chance to pack. Family dinner is about the only time we're all together but even then, it isn't the best time for serious conversation.

On Monday, we're told at school that our Christmas exams are next week. Every year, the Christmas exams consist of every subject jammed into four days of full on torture. I participate in three base subjects: English, Irish and maths and four choice subjects. My choice subjects are French, Physics, Music and Art. I resolve with myself that I'm going to study my ass off this week. Dad leaving or not, these exams matter if I want to do well in my leaving cert* exams next year.

Tuesday comes far too fast and before I know it, we're sitting in the car halfway to Dublin airport. Bella and I have taken the day off school to see Dad off.

We sit in silence as the car glides along the motorway. The sky is almost black and the hailstones haven't stopped in twenty minutes. I'm wearing my earphones and reading my book in attempt to distract myself. I keep turning the page even though the word are going straight through my head because I'm not processing them.

I look up to as we're circling a roundabout and look at one of the signs. Airport 7km, it tells me. I take a deep breath, closing my eyes. In about ten minutes, we'll be at the airport and in another thirty minutes, my dad will be disappearing into security.

I feel a groan escaping my lips before I can stop it. Dad turns around in the passenger seat.

"Okay?"

I bite my lip and nod. He frowns at me but turns back around anyway.

Theo has been driving for the last two hours while continuously talking to Dad. Bella is playing her Nintendo, I'm amazed it hasn't gone dead yet.

4km. I close my book, giving up on it. We're approaching the airport quicker than I thought, there's roundabouts everywhere.

I shut my eyes and bury my head in my heads. A few minutes later I feel a tap on my shoulder and lift my head, I didn't even realise that I was almost asleep. I lift my head, seeing Bella looking at me wide eyed.

"You were asleep," she offers. I look around, we're in the car park. Theo and Dad are at the car boot, putting all Dad's luggage onto a trolley. I get out of the car, reaching my arms up into the air to stretch myself out.

"You gonna help or what?" Theo says.

I walk around to the back and start pulling out the last backpack as Theo and Dad secure the other two suitcases on the trolley. Bella skips over beside me and we begin walking with Dad as Theo locks the car.

The airport is ages away from the car park, which gives us a chance to make some smalltalk. I feel like we're just trying to distract ourself from the inevitable, but I go along with it anyway.

Our mother is working today, which is why she isn't here, not that I care. Her goodbye to Dad this morning (including uncomfortable hug) was enough awkwardness for my lifetime.

The airport is swarming with people; people hugging, people crying, people kissing, people laughing. There's emotions flying around everywhere and I can almost feel the rawness in the air. I look at Dad and he smiles at me reassuringly, throwing an arm over my shoulder. I feel like I'm the one who's leaving my home, not the other way around.

I'm trying to take in everything at once, the noise, the hustle and bustle, all the pictures and advertisements everywhere. I bump into someone, bringing me back to my senses and the guy keeps walking, turning to give me a dirty look. Theo sticks his middle finger up at him, muttering something like "ducking mass-bowl".