The Future Before Me

-03-

Closing my eyes felt like a nightmare with the scenes repeating itself, so I kept them wide open. I felt myself warming up when I heard a knock. Turning my head, I let out the breath I was holding and forced a smile.

Standing behind my open window was Jasper in black pyjama pants and a black v-neck. His hair was tousled and his glasses were perched on his nose awkwardly as he smiled back.

"May I join you?" he asked, his body leaning against the frame of my window.

I nodded without uttering a word and watched him climb onto my table before crawling out. As he approached me I looked away, wiping the tear stains from my cheek. I unwrapped myself from the blanket and threw it over both of our legs.

We sat in silence, staring up at the stars. After a few minutes, I couldn't handle the silence so I turned my head to face Jasper.

"What are you doing here?" I asked, interrupting him from his thoughts.

Jasper continued to watch the stars as he replied with a shrug. "Honestly, I have no idea. I couldn't sleep so I decided to come out and walk around, but I stopped when I saw you on the roof. I couldn't see properly since it was dark, but something told me you were upset so I came over after telling my mom."

I bit my lip and averted my eyes from him when he turned his head to look at me. Instead I kept them locked with the leaves on the tree.

"My mom let you in?" I asked and got a nod for an answer, so I continued. "You didn't have to come you know, but at the same time I'm grateful that you did. You've known me for what? Four days? Five? And look at you, trusting me enough to sit next to me in the middle of the night and let me talk to you."

Jasper didn't reply, instead he watched me as I continued. "This is the thing about humans. There are a lot of humans out in the world and we'll not meet every single one of them, but we do know that there is another person just like us. It's funny how some people are so discriminative towards others because of their race and culture, but they do not understand that even if a person is the same race as you, their personality may be different."

I looked over at Jasper who smiled softly and nodded for me to continue.

I sighed. "Sometimes I just wish that people knew that no matter what you do to change a person it won't work hundred percent. For an example... my dad," I stated, "he has an ego the size of the entire world. He's been raised with three sisters and two brothers; who are older than him, but the way his mind was raised made him believe that he was superior than others. This type of behaviour is something that is developed since he was young and now he's a 50 year old man."

"What are you trying to say about this?"

"I'm trying to say that once someone is grown it is hard to grab the main attitude from them and throw it away because it is now part of their personality. My family members always tell me to go talk to him and try to get him out of it, but they don't understand that it is his personality and no person could change that."

Jasper shook his head as he turned his body toward me. "You wouldn't know that. Your dad may be complicated, but there is always a way of changing someone."

This time it was my turn to shake my head. "Let me rephrase what I meant. There may be a possible way to change a person, but when the person is capable of understanding the community, everything they do and say is part of their personality. Like for an example, I am a rebellious child and you are a sweet, understanding child. One day I decide to do something bad – as in what a 10 year old will do – and when I get caught, my parents will sit me down and tell me that this is the bad pathway. I will listen to every word they say, but I won't take it to heart at all."

Jasper nodded slowly. "And what about me?"

"If you were to do the same thing and got told that this is the bad way, you'll realize what you've done is a mistake and will be careful with everything you do. This adds to your personality and what I've done adds to mine. Maybe one day I do change, but the rebellious attitude will never leave and I will make a mistake once again."

As soon as I was done speaking I looked at Jasper who had his head turned away from me. "I do get it now and I believe that what you're saying connects back to the problem that happened?"

I nodded. "My dad knows my personality and how I'm more softer and sensitive than my sister, but he still tends to be hurtful. I'm not saying that all of his advices are bad because some are right and I try to follow them, but for those stupidest comments he makes gets me angry. I can't do anything about it. It's not something I'm going to hide from anyone cause I know a lot of kids have misunderstandings with their parents. I've spoken to my dad every time we had a fight and he says he understands, but guess what? It happens all over again."

"I understand," he replied with a small smile, running his hand through his hair.

I let out a breath and leaned back on my hands to look at the sky. "You should go back before it gets too late."

Jasper chuckled softly. "I'll see you tomorrow then."

I nodded and watched him go back to my window, but he turned back around and said, "You know I'm just right next door if you want to clear your mind."

"Thank you."

He waved to me one last time before heading out of my room. I looked back up at the stars with a tiny smile. 

_____

A/N: Hi there loves! This chapter is dedicated to @thereader_16 for being an awesome friend in real life. Hayden is sort of based off of her in a way like her personality wise and her love for books.

This chapter is longer than I expected it to be actually! And for those Canadians, I'm from Canada as well!

So tell me what your favourite part was or like your favourite line from this chapter. I'd love some feedback so hit me with them, but don't be harsh.

Favourite song of the day: Wet by It's All in Vain

Hopefully you like liked this chapter! Leave a comment about what you think :)

Love you guys,

Sage