epilogue // i'm sorry for all the harm i have caused

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--Benji's P.O.V--

The Coast Guard conducted one of the largest search-and-rescue missions for a single man in its history, but the body of rescue swimmer Bowser Joseph was never found. What makes someone's life so important? Is it what they did when they were alive or is it how they're remembered after they're gone?

My twin brother would argue that no one's life truly mattered, but what actions they performed when they were alive did. I believed that he lived up to his views. His actions spoke louder than words.

Bowser Joseph had always taught me that life had it struggles, but in the end, it was possible to overcome them or at least fight them head on. He taught me that no matter what happened in life, you always had a chance at winning.

And I hoped that family could overcome their struggles surrounding his death.

I wish that phone call I made to my mother never happened. The moment she heard me crying, she knew. She knew that one of her boys wasn't on this Earth anymore. My entire family was falling apart at the seams, but there was nothing I could do to make it better.

Hanna's reaction was the worst though. At first, I had no clue how to tell her. How could I possibly approach the subject that the guy she loved, my brother, was dead? There wasn't any proper way to approach the subject.

My mom was the one that decided to call Hanna's mom first, which shocked my father. I knew Hanna's mom was a good family friend, but I knew nothing more than that. However, there was some obvious tension based on the phone call that I never overheard.

I hid behind the corner of the doorway as my mother paced the kitchen, phone up to her ear. "Jenna, I know that we have had our problems in the past and I know you don't really like me. Believe me, I know that, but you have to be here when we tell your daughter about Bowser." Her voice crackled as she choked out my brother's name. "She's going to need more support that doesn't come from my family. I don't even think she'll be able to handle looking at Benji since they're twins."

Hanna's mom automatically agreed after that and Hanna was over at my house in ten minutes. She knew something was wrong when she stepped into my house, but she didn't put two and two together until she saw me, standing as straight as a board in the doorway.

"Where's Bowser?" She demanded.

"Honey," Jenna began.

"Where's Bowser?"

I cleared my throat and the red headed girl turned towards me. "Bowser was killed in the line of duty last week. They called off the search for his body the morning."

Hanna cried her heart out that night and I couldn't blame her. My brother wasn't the nicest person towards her, but she loved him just the same.

The military funeral took place the day they called off the search for his body in Alaska. I chose not to be there. However, I did attend the small service my parents had put together.

The last funeral service I had attended in my life was Alexandria's Carlton even though her body was never discovered. Now, I was attending my brother's. Deep in my heart, I knew that he would be following her.

It wasn't a shock to anyone really. Not even Alex's parents.

Nia and Michael Carlton appeared at the funeral and paid their respects, which shocked everyone. Coming back to the town where their daughter disappeared just to attend the funeral of the only suspect in her murder. That seemed crazy to some people. I, on the other hand, was glad they showed up. It showed that they actually did believe that my brother was a good person.

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