I Am Schizophrenic

Chapter Eight (Part Two)

“I won’t obey you, you’re a devil, sure you are! You shall never be called my sister ever again!”

She looked at me with the same provocative and sharp expression and said “Alright, go.”

I quickly left the place, running quickly..trying to escape Sarah’s area. I cried while I ran, I felt there was a huge stone over my chest..I needed to talk to someone. Someone who would really understand. I called Ellen, my supposed-to-be-best friend; asked her to come over at my house to spend some time together. She instantly agreed, and I went home and waited for her. After a quite while, she came. The typical Ellen, with optimistic character and loving her life. We started talking generally, she mentioned some about her ‘amazing’ boyfriend, who loves her..blah, blah, blah; drama. I started talking, telling her about how miserable I’ve been feeling lately (Not giving details about Jake, Derrick, Darkened..etc) But I mentioned to her that I visited Sarah. Her facial expression, and reaction have changed, I couldn’t tell why, but I ignored it. I continued, telling her how devilish Sarah turned out to be, and the hatred she had for this family. Yes, I disliked my family, but it doesn’t mean I’d kill or ruin them! I silenced, waiting for Ellen to talk.

“When you say you visited her; you mean you visited Sarah’s tomb?” she asked in confusion.

“Tomb? What tomb?” I asked her in confusion as well.

“Sarah’s..”

“Why would Sarah have a tomb?” I asked her. Not understanding what she was saying, she must have got out of her senses.

“Never mind..So, you feeling alright?” she asked, but her voice was shattered.

“What’s wrong, El?” I asked her.

“Nothing, don’t worry. I..need to go now! Catch up with you later!” she quickly left.

Why’s everybody weird today ? I thought. I sighed in confusion, trying to clear my mind from all today’s incidents. I got out of my room, went downstairs..finding mother and Ellen talking quietly together ‘She said she saw Sarah..something is sure wrong with her.’  What was Ellen trying to deliver to Mother? What did those people want from me!? I went to them angrily and said in a sort of a shout;

“What do you want!? I’m not crazy, I’m not insane! I swear I saw her..what do you people mean by tomb? I saw her, you hear me!? and taking me to the therapist again won’t make any use! I’m NOT schizophrenic! Prove me wrong, If I am.”

I finished those words and quickly went upstairs, drowned in my tears and thoughts. Couldn’t sleep all night..nightmares were chasing me to death. And every once in a while, I see a shadow passing by on the wall, which freaked me out. I woke up and sat in my bed, thinking about everything..I couldn’t find a solution. Then I heard humming, whispers across the room;

Oh, sister. Sleepless? Kill insomnia then. Ha-ha-ha.

“Sarah?” I asked in a fright. It was obviously her voice, was wicked though. I rubbed my eyes carefully, thinking that she would appear.

That’s right, sis. You know..I saw a quite sharp knife in the kitchen today, which can kill insomnia well.

“Stop..” I whispered.

Oh and..Jake says Hi. But he’s obviously upset that you chose ‘daddy’ over him. Now he’s mine, ha-ha-ha.

“I didn’t!” I protested.

Get the knife, go to his room, and kill him. Kill him, kill him, kill him!

The words kept spinning in my head, it felt so much pressuring..and convincing. I also felt that I was sired to Sarah, and I had to obey her commands. Although, I struggled not to this noon, but I automatically felt myself going to the kitchen, and picking a sharp knife.

That’s my sister. Now go to his room, lovely.

I automatically did what she said; I entered Mother’s and Father’s bedroom, they were fast asleep. I stared at my father for a minute, having second thoughts..he looked so peacefully sleeping, tears filled my eyes and I had the urge to leave their room and go sleep, when I decided to..the devil threatened me;

Don’t you dare, girl! Now finish him! Kill, kill, kill, kill!

Her words kept repeating, too pressured, I closed my eyes and whispered “I love you, dad. I’m sorry.” And held the knife, about to strike it to his chest..when my mother quickly woke up..frightened. She was shocked to see me holding a knife close to my father and about to kill him. “Edward! Wake up, she will kill you!!!!” she screamed. He woke up, staring at the knife in terror..and staring at me shockingly. Mother kept screaming “Tyler! Bella! Wake up, HELP!!!!” quickly Tyler woke up and entered the room and asked;

“What’s happening!?” he saw the knife in my hand and obviously understood. He turned to my mother as she told him;

“Take her to her room, lock her up in there..until I call the mental hospital to arrange with them, to put her there quickly!”

Tyler did what she said; I was looked in my room, I was feeling numb, shocked. Then I heard a sound coming from the window, I looked and it was Jake, he came! He sat next to me on the cold floor, staring at me silently. I started talking, while not looking at him;

“I screwed up.”

“Everything will be alright.” He told me tenderly, while holding my hand.

“I love you, Jake. More than anybody else.” I said, smiling at him.

“Forget me, Tina.” He said in a depressed whisper.

“What? How? I can’t!” I argued with him, he couldn’t leave me right now!

“I’m the reason for your problems. You have to forget me.”

“But, no. I can’t! I won’t leave you.” I started to cry.

“Bye, Tina.” Jake started to fade away gradually, I felt so cold and numb and all I could remember was the blood pouring from my wrist, and blackness filled my eyes..not seeing a future for me.