Random [VerKwan] ✔

47 [0.5 special]

I stared at the hem of my hospital gown, of all the places I want to woke up in, why does it have to be the hospital? I guess I cant choose huh? But even if I can, maybe it wont come true. Pero iisa lang naman ang gusto kong lugar. Iisa lang. And that would be in his arms. His only. I looked at the window of my room, makakalabas pa kaya ako sa kwartong to? But this is my last chance. Huli na to sa limang panahong ibinigay sakin ng doctor ko.

"Seungkwan! Seungkwan! Saan ka ba pupunta?" Minghao asked me, while holding few books in his hands. "Sa library, bakit?" He only rolled his eyes and followed me. "Kanina pa kita tinatawag ngayon ka lang humarap" He replied. "Oh eh bakit nga?" I asked "papatulong nga kasi ako sayong magbuhat! Bruha kang bakla ka ngayon ka lang humarap" I just "tsk"-ed in response. Tamad talaga netong bakla na to. "Sungit naman dis gay" ng palabas na sila ng library ay bigla akong napahawak sa doorknob ng pintuan at napaluhod "Seung----- holy shit. Anong nangyayari sayo?!" Gulat na sabi ni Minghao. I felt someone is caressing my back, Im having chestpains. Yun nga lang ay mas masakit pa ito. I feel like my heart was being poked by a million of needles. All I can do is cry. I cant scream. I feel a lump in my throat. Shit. "M-ming-haAAHHHH! " and then everything went black.

I woke up for the first time in a hospital. Must be Minghao's decision. Masyadong nagpanic. Sa ospital ako dinala. Adik talaga yon. Neverthless I know it's not severe. Hindi naman ata ganun kalala ang magkaroon ng chestpain at mahimatay hindi ba?

I shifted my gaze to the door as it opens.

"Hello, Seungkwan. Do you remember me?" A familiar face came up and went near my bed. "It must be a long time huh? Okay. Fine. My name is Ms. Xandra Lim. Im... The personal doctor of your former father. " I sense the awkwardness in her tone. Ramdam nya siguro ang hinanakit ko. But then she smiled though hindi ito gaanong umabot sa mata nya. "I want to..tell you something. " She sighed and continued thinking that maybe my silence is her sign to do so, "Your father.. Was a really strong person, Seungkwan. I rarely doubt that both of your parents wouldnt raise you well. You are such a darling." She said and touched mu cheeks. "Ah, my eyes are getting watery. But before I cry, I want to tell you something very very important. Please understand this very carefully. Okay? " She further explained "W-when your father died I know you have been through a lot already and hearing your mother, follows is quite to bring for a child like you. I... Know, you have struggled a lot. Pero hindi ko to sasabihin sayo para madagdagan pa ang mga paghihirap mo, im saying this because I want to let you know your situation para ma-let go----" I cut her off. Like what she said I have gone through enough already at siguro sa point na to wala ng mas sasakit pa sa nararamdaman ko kahit ano pa ang sitwasyon ko hindi ba? "Just get to the point Ms. Lim, I want to know what is going on. Please" she cried. Silently "Seungkwan, you.... you have the same situation as your father. " she said. H-hindi ko maintindihan. H-hindi ko naintindihan. "A-ano po?" She again cried. "Im sorry to break this to you, but you have the same illness as your father. Im very very sorry." And that's how my world breaks into pieces. P-pareho kami ng sakit ni appa? P-paano na ang mga kapatid ko? Paano na kami? Paano na ang kibabukasan ko? Paano na ako? Anong mangyayari sakin? I dont want to die. Im too young.

I stayed in the hospital for a few days until my doctor came in again and talked to me.

"Seungkwan, lets talk at my office" I looked at Ms. Lim as she lead me to her office "take a sit" as I took my sit she follow my every move "You might know already what is happening to you but I just wanna confirm it for you" she said. This scenario flood through my mind, seems familiar but it isnt. Scenes flashed through my mind, ah yes, my dad. I remembered him taking this familiar seat in this familiar room. Same situation and same reason. Fuck life. "I know, alam na alam mo na ito... Dahil ito rin ang dahilan, ng pagkawala ng isa sa mga magulang mo, im sorry if I brought this up. But, you see, hindi katulad ng appa mo, we can sort things out. Maaga mong napansin ang mga sintomas ng sakit mo, at... We can heal you. Please re-think about your situation, Seungkwan. Alalahanin mo ito para sa kanila, sa mga magulang mo. Seungkwan, Ive been a part of your family since your father was admitted at this same hospital, and it saddens me to know na... Baka magkapareho kayo ng kapalaran ng appa mo. That's why im doing this. Gusto kong mabuhay ka, Seungkwan. I care for you, and your family. I hope you know that." She explained. I just played with my fingers as she speak. And I stood up, "Ill think about it. Thank you for your concern. I appreciate it a lot. Goodbye." But before I open the door she called me "Seungkwan, wait" she sighed. "You have only five chances until you... die" I saw tears in her eyes. Hindi ba dapat ako ang umiiyak sa kalagayan kong to? "Five attacks only, Seungkwan and after that... You might be gone" And I stormed out of the office. Pagiisipan? I made up my mind even before I came here. Hinding-hindi ako magpapaopera. Five chances huh? Ganun ba talaga kailangang kahaba para pahirapan pa ako? Bakit hindi nalang nila inisang bagsak. Atleast then I wouldnt be in pain anymore. Atleast... Hindi ako unti-unti pang nahihirapan. Thinking about it I might have this one reason inside me kaya okay lang sakin ang mawala sa mundong ito. It's because of them. My parents. Atleast I can be with them. If possible.