Going By His Rules (A #Garmau Fan Fiction) *Completed*

~Honesty~

Every moment I've spent with him felt like my last time I would ever do this again. I didn't want that. I wanted to just hug him, forever.

All these terrible flashbacks were replaying in my head. Some were about me running from Garroth, and then Zane holding my mouth with his bloody hand while he stabbed me. I never knew that it only took one person to break you down so much.

All this time I wanted to die, giving up on finding Garroth. But no matter what Zane did to me, I'm still alive. I'm barely still able to walk and talk... And I can still smile... Because... I made it too him. I did it.

But even if I was to never see Zane again, I would never forget everything he's done to me. Even if I did start a new chapter in my life, I wouldn't ever forget...

When I first saw Garroth, I just couldn't stop crying. An hour had passed and tears were still flowing. Garroth's shirt was probably soaked by now, but he didn't seem uncomfortable in the slightest.

Garroth never let go of me, as did I. I looked up to see his face that I missed so much. It was stained with tears. My heart felt like it clenched. It killed me to see him cry. It always made me feel terrible when he cried.

Garroth barely ever cried, but when he did, it was for something very important. He cried real tears. Tears that meant something. Which is why it always killed me.

I wiped his right cheek with my left hand. He twitched a bit, probably waking up from a tiny nap. He opened his eyes and looked down on me.

"...hey, what's wrong..?" He yawned. I shook my head. I didn't mean to wake him up.

"...sorry..." All I could do was whisper instead of talk. My voice was completely gone by now.

"A-Are you okay..? Is something bothering you?"

I didn't move. I just continue to stare at the ceiling.

"Well, can I say what's bothering me?"

I looked up at him, waiting for an answer. He looks back at me and blushes. I do the same.

"It's... Well, you look so hurt. Before, when I looked at your eyes, they were a vibrant color. It matched your personalitily. You were so happy and lively. Now... they look... dark. Like a depressing kind of dark. Please, tell me what happened... or... what I could do to help you..." Garroth was crying as much as I was. It killed me.

I didn't want to just tell him exactly what happened. Yes, I did want to forget, but out of everyone I know, he deserved to know what happened to me most of all. But I didn't want to make him feel guilty.

If I did tell him, he would change. He wouldn't be the same Garroth I knew. He wouldn't be happy. He would just always blame himself. I don't want that. I never wanted that.

"... I... I can't tell you... yet. It will hurt you. I just want you to stay... happy..."

"I can't just stay happy when my... best friend is all broken and unable to speak. You are covered in bruises... I need to know. Look, I am happy you're here... But it's bothering me that you're not happy." Garroth was still blushing. I smiled, but I felt it slowly fade.

"I'm... sorry... I'll tell you, but... just not... now... Please..."

Garroth gives me a worried look, but then smiles.

"Fine, whatever makes you happy... And... Why did you... Kiss me..? What made you... y'know... feel... that way?"

I felt my face burn up. I knew why, but I just didn't know how to put it...