Damaged Goods ~ A 5sos Lashton story

Chapter 14

Luke is definitely not the one to randomly cuddle, but he gathered his blanket and walked into Ashton's room.

"Wha...? Luke, what are you doing?"

"Your bed is warmer than mine," Luke lied. He just wanted to lay in Ashton's bed forever.

Luke cuddled into the blankets and curled into a ball. Half of his face was covered with Ashton's blanket so he took deep breathes to smell Ashton's cologne.

Ashton rubbed Luke's cheek with the pad of his thumb until Luke fell asleep. He noticed the Luke rubbed his ankles when he's falling asleep. It was oddly adorable.

"I love you so much, Lukey," Ashton whispered before he fell asleep as well.

-

Luke was shivering and talking in his sleep when Ashton woke up. Luke shouldn't be shivering because he had more blankets than anyone in the whole house. But Ashton took his blankets and added another layer to Luke's cocoon to help keep him warmer.

"I-Is your a-air o-on?" Luke's teeth chattered.

Ashton jumped out of the bed to turn the air unit off. He usually slept with his air conditioner on because it was hot; he didn't remember to turn that off last night. Luke's so small that he has no fat to keep himself even slightly warm.

"Oh yeah," Ashton giggled softly as he did almost every other time he talked.

He crawled back into the bed, the sheets feeling almost as good the second time if not better, and laid an arm on Luke. They were both faced towards eachother so they could stare into the others eyes.

"I really do love you, Luke," Ashton said as he searched for Luke's shaky hands under the sheets.

Luke didn't really know what to say so he just mumbled. "Yeah."

They stared at each other for another moment, their hands were folded tightly together under the twelve blankets Luke required.

Ashton didn't want to leave it at that, he wanted to confess more (as weird as it is). But he wanted to do a lot of thing he probably couldn't or shouldn't. He wanted to walk around like tourist holding Luke's hands. Buy one over-sized milkshake and use two straws to share with Luke.

Maybe one day.

"Would you mind if I gave you a kiss on the cheek?"

Luke smiled, "You can if you want to."

Ashton leaned in and left a small kiss on Luke's cheek. He hovered for a moment, cascading icy breathes down Luke's cheeks.

And the ache for Ashton grew stronger. Luke wanted to kiss Ashton on the lips this time, but he ignored the urge. Now is not the time for a typical shag; they shouldn't even be doing that anyways. It's stupid.

-

"I'm so tired of being a disappointment!" Luke cried.

"You're not a disappointment." Ashton cooed into Luke's ear as he gently rubbed his hair. They sat in the middle of a pile of broken glass on the kitchen floor.

Everything was so perfect until Luke saw a comment to him on twitter. Luke threw his phone onto the ground, absolutely shattering the screen. He exploded and cried and shouted incoherent sentences.

Such a simple comment sent Luke on a downward spiral.

"It looks like @Luke5SOS has gained some weight"

"I can't fucking do this anymore," Luke shouted as he threw his phone to the ground and stood off the couch.

"Yes I am." Luke ripped out of Ashton's grip. "And I'm tired of being so god damn fat!"

Luke feels good while he's screaming everything out. It feels so good let everything out so loudly. Because when he's screaming he doesn't feel like he needs to puke so damn much, he doesn't feel like he's drowning anymore.

To bad Michael and Calum were to busy at the store to see all this.

"I feel so full all the time!
I can't stand the feeling of this gut hanging out of my stomach and the food just sitting there! It's like... all the time... I just... I-I can't anymore, Ashton. I can't keep pretending like everything's okay during a concert. I-I c-can't keep eating and... and..."

By the end of his rant Luke was sobbing harder than he ever has before. His hands were gripping his hair so tight Ashton was sure that he was going to rip out all of his hair.

Ashton pushed himself off of the ground, mindful not to cut his hand on the shattered plate glass. He wrapped his arms around Luke's waist and engulfed Luke into a hug.

Luke cried into Ashton's shoulders instead of his chest because of his height.

"I'm s-so tired of crying all the f-fucking time..."

Ashton rubbed small circles into Luke's back, "It's alright, Lukey."

Luke stopped crying eventually and walked away from Ashton and to the couch.

Ashton squatted next to the couch and grabbed Luke's hand, "Do you need anything?"

Luke slowly shook his head, "I want to go home."

Go home?

"Lukey, you are home." Ashton's eyebrows furrowed at the comment.

Luke shook his head once again.

"No. I miss my mum," he whispered softly.

Ashton's only heard Luke talk about his mum twice. This being the second time. Ashton missis his mum too, but it's completely different. Ashton could fly home and go see her- Luke can't.

The only memories Luke remembers so clearly of his mum is when she's yelling with a bottle of scotch in her hand (that eventually fell to the floor).

It makes Luke want to cry. But he's just so damn exhausted that he can't. Everything wears him out here lately, even driving.

"I'm sorry." Was all Ashton could say. He's hardly sure what he's apologizing for but it counts for something.

Luke doesn't say anything else to add to the conversation. Instead he says, "Lay down with me."

So Ashton crawls behind Luke on the couch and covers the majority of their bodies with a blanket. No movement was saw under the blanket besides Luke rubbing his ankles together.

It feels weird laying next to Luke like this. Weird, but in a good way. Ashton never wants to leave this spot even if his life depends on it.

*

I'm aware that this chapter was shit haha

But I think you'll like the next ones :)

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