Nerd with No Limits

Chapter 18

''You always have options, just need to embrace them and stop future predictions.. Embrace the risks, and start living.. Hopefully one day you'll get your direction." I was speechless. He was giving me life talks which were actually true. I was always afraid of my father, and his position.. Expectations, that ''you're doomed to be caged'' I was afraid, I'd lose myself in all that glamorous diamonds, which were nothing but thorns. Painful thorns, whom people called ''Luxury'' Ever saw a rich-class girl smiling happily ? I don't think so.. Being away from normalcy and accepting the manners and meeting that standards at age of two, when you barely started breathing was a tragedy.. Now wasn't it?

He took my hand and i screamed in agony.. I didn't felt the pain, but i was hurt.. Someway or other those advice hurt a painful door in my heart. He cracked my walls. I was adamant to stay away from him, but someone fate brought us together. I never questioned my fate, but i do now. Realisation hit me, when antiseptic liquid was being applied on my wound but i didn't felt pain. Tears poured from my eyes, heck i could see his fingers trembling because he felt my pain. I had glint of determination but not pain.

Was it normal for me? Was it normal how i lost someone while he saved my life? Was it normal how her sister was kidnapped in front of me, and i was standing there, watching them let her go? Was it normal for me to change my hair, my attire, and live every moment of my life in fear.. Fear they'll kill me, but worse, fear they'll harm my parents.. My rose.. My little family, my small little paradise.. I wasn't afraid of myself, because fear made my soul hollow. I never felt pain, i embraced it. But i didn't wanted my sister to face my consequences.

''You don't feel pain, do you?'' I smiled shyly.

''Ive taken worse then this, pain lives inside me.'' His hold on my hand tightened. I can feel his blood flowing with simple touch, i can feel his veins popping out.. But why would he care?

''If i were you, I wouldn't lie. I wouldn't shield myself from fear. I wouldn't-'' Before he could complete his sentence, I fell down with thud. I was near to breakdown. He cant break my walls.. No no he cant. I was shaking in fear, that past came right back to me.. That night, that street.. That chasing, and that bullet pierced my heart. In one second... only in one second, i lost him.

''You don't know pain of losing someone.. You don't know pain of results that someone has to pay due to your mistakes.. You don't know how it feels to lose your world in one second. You're not helpless, but just immobile. Useless. Worthless...'' And it came. I screamed in pain as i pierced the broken glass again and again on my wrists, tears pouring heavily from my eyes.

Jayden's p.o.v

That scream haunted living day lights of me. I grabbed the broken glass immediately from her hands before she could damage herself more. She cried in agony, so much pain hidden inside of her.

I wondered about my plan.. Ashley... But right now, Natalie needed me. I hugged her and showered all my love to her. I kept convincing her with soothing words which were fake to her ears. Soon she was calm. But I know this was silence before the storm. Her mind was like a jigsaw puzzle. Nor could I figure her out, nor the missing pieces of the puzzle.

She kept bringing up someone, some scene.. some one whom she loved all her life and he or she is no more? Why I felt somewhere we are connected. We shared the same pain, but I didn't lost her yet. I know Ashley was alive. Somewhere in the corner, somewhere breathing. Somewhere hoping for her brother. But I need to destroy them. Destroy my own mistakes. Destroy my own fate.

"Have faith Natalie. Wheel of your pain will come to halt soon. That's my promise to you" She was snoring now. I didn't knew if she heard me but I smiled.

But I wouldn't fall for her. Once I get my sister back and I destroy everything I'll make sure never to see her again.

I tucked her in her bedroom more like our hotel room. At this point Aunt's wedding was totally forgotten. I went back to the kitchen and tossed a stash of cash to that girl.