1. ass-constricting torture device of biological warfare

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{baby, i'm fragile.}

"You didn't inhale the scented bath soaps again, did you?" Steve asked from the shower, Bucky grimaced in mental pain, cracking his knuckles. It's happening again! he thought through gritted teeth.

"It was that one time!" Bucky argued, gripping his chair and closing his eyes

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"It was that one time!" Bucky argued, gripping his chair and closing his eyes. He silently swore, wishing Steve would just get over it.

"And you rolled on the carpet, crossing your heart, yelling the world was about the be attacked by fluffy unicorns that puke out artilleries."

"Just come down, would you?"  Bucky bellowed. When he heard nothing but rustling, he yelled at the top of his lungs again. "Steveeee!"

"Calm down, Buck." Steve emerges from the bathroom in nothing but a towel hanging low on his waist. Biting his lips, and grinning a little, he asked, "So you saw a female version of Doctor Zola?"

"Don't patronize me, Punk," the Winter soldier spat.

"Jerk." Steve smiled, disappearing again into the bathroom. "I have to get going."

He knew what he saw, the girl down at the bakery who makes his favorite cranberry muffins, who works part time at the animal shelter too-  she looks exactly like Dr. Zola; the man who put him into eternal damnation.

He sighed, could he possibly be another step closer to Crazy Town?

"Steve, do you think they'll accept me in a nursing home for the elderly?" Bucky asked, looking up, suddenly forgetting what he needed Steve for.

"Steve, do you think they'll accept me in a nursing home for the elderly?" Bucky asked, looking up, suddenly forgetting what he needed Steve for

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"Don't even think about it."

"I searched up paranoia, and crazy conspiracy theories and they all sum up to early schizophrenia..." This getting old thing, it scared Bucky inside out.

"Bucky, no," Steve interrupted. "Just go out for a stroll, it's sunny outside."

"That's the thing, it's hot!" Bucky whined. "You know how sweaty I get."

Steve rolled his eyes, and Bucky wondered whether his best friend was getting tired of him. "Well, I'm going to the Apple Store."

Bucky raised his eyebrow, at this time of day? "To get apples?"

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