((COMPLETE!)) What Am I To You? || Namjoon FF

Chapter 29: Kim JoA

3years timeskip
Its been 3 years after chae leave me, and our baby, Kim joa. Joa 3 years old now. She big already, too bad she couldn't see her mom and I feel bad about that. She keep asking me about chae, "appa, where is mom?" "Appa, can I meet her?". If we bored, I will show chae pictures. And she start smiling madly, she must be proud having a mom with pretty face, nice body. I wish I can tell her, where is her mom. But, I don't have strength to tell her about that.

One fine day, we don't do anything just watching television all day, suddenly Joa ask me about her mom again. What I can do is smile. "Appa, is there anything you do with mommy? Maybe music? " she ask me. She is so smart when She speak, maybe my blood. I guess. Lol joking. "Hmm.... hold on. Wait here okay?" I told her and run to my room. I get my laptop and stuff. There's a video about, me and chaelin singing "love is not over-bts" 4 years ago. I run downstairs to get Joa.

I connect my laptop to television, searching that video, "hah found it" . I click play, and sat beside Joa. The melodies playing in our ears, Her eyes so focused seeing her mom in the television. I can't hold my tears, and so do Joa. Joa hug me tightly, her tears start falling and it break my heart. "Mommy..." she said slowly to me. Tell me how to be strong, when your own daughter crying, because she want to meet her mom so bad.

The video end, Joa still crying in my embrace. She just a baby, only 3 years old and it's too early for her to face this situation. "That is your mom" I said. She nodded. "How do you feel?" I ask her. "Miss her" she said. I smile looking at her face. "Shes in good place now. No need to worry. You have me" I said to her again. She look Confused. "Good place? What kind? How it look? Is she happy? Can we visit her?" She ask me. I smiled looking at her confused face. "One day." I said replying her questions.
"Lets go sleeping and dream about mommy. Should we?" I ask her. "Lets go" she shouted happily.

Morning
Clock showing 7:30am , still early to wake Joa up. And I decide to write lyrics, this is such a gold time to write lyrics cause when Joa wake, she will never let me doing work. You know kids?

"Ahhh, where did I put my earphone? Oh God" Im searching like everywhere, but I can't find my earphone. I open my drower where chaelin always put my "missing stuff" as expected, there it is. I pick it up, and I saw pink letter, "what is this?" I said to myself. "Chae" is written on this letter. So I dare myself to open that letter.

"Its me. Your wife, chaelin Lee.
Kim Namjoon, knowing you is the best thing in my life. Having you is my goals. That moment when you propose me , I feel this world is mine. Too bad, when you reading this, I'm already gone. Maybe.
Thank you for listening to my problems, always there for me. Pay me your attention even you busy with your work. I'm sorry if I made mistake and never realize, I'm sorry for making you worry about me. Sorry for stressed you out. I can't be best, but you are perfect for me. Guide me when I lost my direction. Always lead me to straight way. Thank you. I love you till my last breathe. Maybe, when you read this I'm already gone. Forgive my wrong.
Your love,
Chaelin..."

My vision start to blurry, "I miss you chae" .

Timeskip 9:30am
"Hey hyung" jimin approach me. Currently at dance practice studio. "Hey...have you done practicing?" I ask him. "Yes. This room is hot" he nag and lying on the floor. "Where is Joa?" I ask him. Without saying any words, he pointing at the corner of the room, where Joa, taehyung and jungkook playing "peek-a-boo" seems like she's having fun with her uncles. Besides having me, joa have 6 idiot uncles who never get tired of her.
I was looking at three of them, this actually made my day, seeing my daughter playing with her uncles. Then, yoongi hyung enter the room, and bring BBQ chicken in his hands. "Lets eatttt" he shouted , and the kids notice him. And surrounded him, include Joa. "Here, here, come here" yoongi hyung smile happily as he see Joa . Joa run to yoongi hyung embrace. I smiled looking at them.

"Hey, do you guys have any plan for this summer?" I ask them. Every summer, big hit will give us rest for 1 week, so I decide to go vacation with them. "Hmmm... I don't do anything." Said jin hyung. "Yeah me too" said hoseok. "How about others?" I ask again. They shook their head so that means no. "Wanna go to my resort? We can have fun. Throw a party, eat till morning, playing some games and others. How about that?" I ask again. "Serious? Woah sounds interesting! " said hoseok. "Yeahhh! I wanna go there too" said jimin. "If you guys agree with that, this Saturday on 8:30am . ill pick you guys, Okay?". "Yeayyyy!" The shouted happily.

Timeskip Saturday
"Joa are you ready to meet your uncles?" I ask her. "Yes" she said. I smile and put her on baby car seat, to keep her safe. Heading to big hit building to pick 6 of them and go to my resort.

On time 8:30pm we arrive at big hit, and I called yoongi hyung .
"I'm here, hurry up" I said. "Aa yea yea. Wait" said yoongi hyung on the line. After 3 minutes waiting, I finally saw 6 of them with happy face.
Sure this vacation gonna be fun. "Hiii joaaaa" said taehyung to Joa. She smiling showing her eyesmile to us. "She so cute" said jimin. "Well my blood. Hurry" I said jokingly. Done putting their suit on the truck they jumped into the truck and we ready to go.

"Ah hyung! I forgot, bang pd-nim told me to hand you this paper" said jimin who sit behind my seat. "What is that? " I ask him. "I don't know too hyung" he said again. "Put it on the drower" I said.

Along the journey filled with laughing, smiling, shouting. We having fun like theres no tomorrow.

"We here! " I shouted and wake them up. "Oh already?" Said jin hyung. "Yes.. Hurry hurry" I said again.

"My key please" I said to the lady. "Have fun sir" she said and hand me the key. And we heading to my room where I and chaelin always spend time together back then. "I miss you. "