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I invited Ghost to come stay with Ryan and I. After all that happened, I felt it was for the best. He had been with Chris initially, but Chris is too focused on his new girlfriend to be taking care of Ghost. Ryan didn't care. He knew how upset Ghost was and he needs a place he can heal properly. A ranch in the middle of nowhere with a cat and a baby raccoon seemed like a pretty decent place.
Oh, that reminds me. Ghost hasn't met Chip. Ryan got the brilliant idea to adopt a raccoon. Honestly I've been waiting on the punchline here because anytime my name and the word "raccoon" are in a sentence together it's a joke. I'm so used to them being wild animals though, but the damn thing acts like a kitten. When Ghost and I walked into the house, it was of course the first thing he noticed. He saw the fur ball laying in Ryan's lap as he laid on the couch watching TV.
"Did you guys get another cat?" He asked. Then Chip's head popped up from under the blanket. "That's not a cat." Ghost muttered obviously.
"No," I sighed, "It's a raccoon. His name is Chip."
"He's friendly if you want to pet him." Ryan said.
Ghost cautiously walked towards him but hesitated from touching him. "When was the last time he had a bath?"
"Like a week ago. He was born in raised in captivity though. He doesn't have disease or anything." He scoffed.
Cautiously, he pet the top of Chip's head. I could tell it still freaked him out a little bit. Despite the stereotype of band dudes being dirty, filthy rockers, we're actually pretty clean people. Ghost especially is a freak about hygiene. He'll throw a fit on tour if he doesn't get a shower at least every other day. After barely touching Chip, he took his hand back and held it against his chest.
"He's not going to bite you or anything." Ryan told him.
He sighed, "I believe you but it's just weird to me. I think I still prefer cats."
"To each their own." He muttered as he scratched Chip's head.
Ryan went back to watching Family Feud. It was the only thing on TV at this time of day. He's the type that talks to the TV a lot but I don't mind. I talk to myself all the time and he has to put up with it. Anyways, I brought Ghost's things back to my bedroom. I'm letting him sleep in here and I'll sleep on the couch. He argued me on it but I eventually insisted he's the guest.
"If you need anything, I think you know you're way around this place pretty well." I said, "Don't be afraid to ask for anything if you need it, okay?"
"'Kay. Thank you." He murmured.
☾•☽
At some point in the night I passed out on the couch watching Dexter. It's supposedly bad for you to fall asleep watching TV but I don't care. The TV show of choice probably wasn't the best idea either. It could lead me to have some fucked up dreams. Turns out, I was not the one that had the traumatic nightmare. What woke me up was hearing a thud in the next room.
Fucking Ryan sleeps through everything. He didn't hear it but I did. My heart raced knowing that came from my room, where Ghost was sleeping. I got up from a dead sleep and rushed in there to make sure he was okay. When I opened the door, I found him on the floor. He was struggling to sit up because he was hyperventilating. He must've fallen off the bed in his sleep. Which was weird because he never falls out of his bunk on tour.
I helped him to sit up and tried to sooth him down. "Shh, just breathe. It's okay. I'm here." I spoke softly.
It helped him a little bit. He pulled his knees up to his chest and covered his face with his hands. Ghost was trying to hide that he was crying. He's probably to the point that he's sick of it. I would be if I were him. I sat down beside him and ran my hand up and down his back. His head fell on my shoulder.
"I had the worst fucking nightmare." He managed to say between his hitched breathes. His crying caused him to make several gasps for air. "I-I dreamt th-that Keri... Keri b-beat me to death."
Hearing those words made my heart temporarily stop. If it was that painful for me to hear him say it, I can't imagine what it was like to live through that. Thankfully it was just a dream. I tightened my grip around him to make him feel secure.
"He's not going to hurt you. Not on my watch. Okay? He's on the other side of the country. It was just a dream." I said.
"It felt so real." He responded, barely able to get his words out.
"Shh, it's okay. It was just a dream." I soothed, "You need to calm down or else you're going to make yourself sick."
"I-I know." He stuttered and wiped his eyes.
I've seen Ghost cry more times in the last few months than I have in the entirety of our friendship. It just breaks my heart. Losing his grandma, who practically raised him, was enough. Putting the stress of Keri on top of it was just too much. I wish murder was legal because I would kill him if I could. I mean, I always could, but the probability of getting caught in this day in age is pretty high. I'd rather be with Ghost and not in a prison cell, thank you very much. I will find a way to make him pay though.
As much as I loved Ghost when he was all dressed up, ready for the stage, he looked really cute this way too. Not a stitch of makeup and he was just in an oversized sweater. He's so sweet and too good for our bastard world. Ghost and I sat there for a few minutes more while he calmed down. Just as he would get to an okay state, the painful emotions would wash over him again. He was start to cry again and we'd have to start over. I was worried he was going to puke or something with the way he was choking on his tears.
Don't ask me what possessed me to do this. Something in me just told me it was the correct thing to do. So far my gut feeling has done me a lot of good where Ghost is concerned. I put my hand along his jawline and lifted his head. He looked up at me with the thin tears streaming off the side of his cheeks. It's hard to see the Devil in him when he looks like such an angel. I leaned down and pressed my lips against his. Suddenly he finally let go of the tension that was seizing his body.
His lips were just as sugary as he was. It felt beyond amazing to finally kiss him. He pressed his lips back against mine tenderly. In efforts to not make this too awkward, I pulled away before the kiss got too long. We opened our eyes at the same time and just stared at each other. He kissed me too, so it must've not been too bad. Yet he wasn't saying anything. Fuck these goddamn mixed messages.
"Uhm, we should get back to sleep." I suggested.
Ghost swallowed down a lump in his throat. He sat himself up properly. "Y-Yeah, I guess..."
I stood up and offered him a hand. He allowed me to pull him up to his feet. Ghost brought his hands to himself and played with the ends of his sweater. He glanced at the bed, then back to me.
"Um, Ricky?" He murmured.
"Yeah?"
"Would you, um... Would you sleep in here with me tonight?" He asked.
It took everything in my to play it cool. Of course I'd give anything to fall asleep and wake up next to him. "Of course." I responded.
Ghost got a smile small. It was adorable. He radiated beauty every time he cracked even the smallest grin. He sat back down on the bed and crawled under the covers. I walked around to the other side and climbed in next to him. I thought he just wanted to sleep with someone in the room. He actually wanted much more than that though. As soon as I relaxed into the sheets, he cuddled up to me and clung to my like a koala. I'm definitely not complaining.
