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Chris plopped down beside me, only slightly annoying me. I had my guitar in my lap but I've only managed to strum a few notes in the span of an hour. It's been two weeks since Ghost left the tour. Half the time I can't even remember the fill in's name. I don't care about him because he's not my Ghost. I don't really care about anything now that Ghost isn't here.
We toured almost an entire album before he joined the band. I once knew life without him. Now, though, I can't bring myself back to those days. Tour just isn't the same without him and it's really starting to get to me.
"We need to talk." Chris said.
I sighed as I scratched something out in my notebook, "No, we don't."
He leaned over me and stole my pencil from me. Then he threw it down the bunk hallway and we heard Vinny mutter an "owe". Normally I'd be laughing my ass off at that, but I just don't have the energy. Chris leaned over and pushed the door closed.
"Yes," He huffed as he sat up straight, "We do. You're depressed without Ghost here."
I glared at him out of the corner of my eye. My hair fell into my face, which probably added to my moodiness. "Yeah, so what?" I grumbled.
"So what?" He questioned in disbelief, "You're the one that convinced Ghost to leave. Yet you're miserable without him here. Even a fool could see what's going on here."
"Well, apparently I'm a fucking idiot, because I have no idea what you're talking about." I replied.
"There's only one reason a person would ever let themselves be miserable so that another could be happy. You love him."
As he said it, my heart shook. If you've ever been caught in a terrible lie, that's exactly how it feels. My stomach wanted to turn at the thought of anyone knowing. Sometimes I get sickened with myself that I ever admitted to my own mind that I care about him in a different way than the others. I leaned my arm on the side of my guitar and rested my hand on my neck. My fingers couldn't help themselves from tangling in my hair.
"Of course I love him. He's like a brother to me." I said in a small voice.
"You know what I mean, Ricky." Chris responded, "You don't love him in the same way you love me or the guys. I always thought it, with the way you look at him and everything-"
"Chris!" I snapped at him, "I'm not gay, okay?"
"And Ghost isn't one gender, so your sexuality wouldn't fucking matter in this case. Unless you were asexual, but we both know that's not true." He dared to sass me.
