Finding the Beauty Underneath

XIV

My primal instinct was to lean deeper into the kiss and put my hand in Erik's dark locks. I quickly stopped myself and gently pulled my face away from his.

Erik sighed and said, "Oh, Emilie! I was so frightened I'd never see you again. I was in so much pain that I did not know if I would ever recover." He smiled and hugged me. He pulled away from me and looked so relieved that it made me feel awful for what I was about to tell him. When he saw my countenance, his face darkened and his smile soon faded away. "What is wrong, Emilie? You look upset. . ."

"Erik. . .there's something I need to discuss with you. I don't know how you will feel about it, but I beg you to listen to all of what I have to say and to please not be rash when I am finished. Please just respect what I have to say."

He looked at me skeptically before slowly nodding his head. "What is it?"

"I'll be blunt; I love you Erik, but not in a romantic way. I love being with you, but we're just too different. We clash too much. That doesn't mean I never want to see you again. . .I still want to be friends with you."

Erik looked almost betrayed. He looked at me with his eyebrows furrowed together and said, "But you. . .love me. . ."

"Yes, just not as a lover. . .I just want us to be friends. Does that make sense?"

I could tell that Erik was struggling with his emotions. He looked sad, angry, confused, and slightly hurt all at the same time. "So you love me. . .just not enough to. . .to. . ." His eyes met mine, then looked down at the ring on my thumb. ". . .to be my wife?"

My eyebrows went up in surprise. I hadn't about the ring for very long. I had no idea it was that grand of a gesture. I slowly took the ring off of my thumb and turned it over with my fingers. "You meant this ring as a proposal?"

"Well. . .sort of. I-I gave the ring to you originally because I did not think I could recover from this. . . I honestly thought that I would not make it to the hospital in time. I assumed that if I did make it through this. . .that you would want to. . ." Erik's voice trailed off.

I thought for amoment. I didn't expect this response from Erik. "Is that why you called me your wife earlier?"

"No. I called you my wife that so that doctor would let you accompany me in the ambulance. . .I didn't want to be alone. . ." Erik's face hardened and he practically glared at me when he said, "But I guess I shouldn't have called you my wife, huh? Since it seems I'd end up alone in the end."

I was appalled. "Erik! Don't say that! Can't we just be friends? Is that not good enough for you? Just because I don't want to be your wife doesn't mean you'll be alone!" I found myself getting needlessly angry.

"I just thought that after all we've been through together, you'd want to be more than friends!" He shouted.

I sighed deeply. "Please don't be angry with me, Erik! This is simply how I feel about the situation. Can't you respect my feelings?"

"Well, how am I supposed tofeel, Emilie?" His voice gradually increased in volume. "How am I supposed to feel about this, huh?"

I felt incredibly offended. "Not completely selfish! That's how! You only care for your own feelings! You don't care if I want to be just friends with you. All you care about is me being your wife without even considering how I feel! At least when I tell you my feelings, I don't give you tokens of my affections and try to force it upon you!" I threw the ring at him. It hung in the air briefly before hitting him in the chest, then clattering onto the floor.

Erik looked furious. "A token of my affection? You act like I am trying to buy your love. You were utterly infatuated with me before all of this. What has changed your opinion?. . .This?" He put a hand on his mask.