I Love You (Just Not In The Most Heterosexual Way) || Syan Oneshots||

no. totally not

The first thing you need to know is that I, Ryan Higa am totally not gay. I mean. Seriously. Me? Gay? What a joke.

Second thing is no, I am not in love with Sean Fujiyoshi because me and him? That's crazy! That's stupid! That's totally never going to happen.

So do you get it? I'm straight. My feelings for Sean are entirely platonic. I don't think about touching him, or kissing him, or dating him in any shape or form. Because that is just crazy.

"Lies," is all Arden says.

I send her a dirty look. No. She totally did not just ask me to tell her about how I feel about my best friend. I totally did not lie to her. I am a very honest person.

"I don't lie."

"You just did," she says. And I roll my eyes. I did not. Really. Believe me. "You have it bad," she looks thoughtful. Like a psychiatrist trying to help her patient.

I don't reply, instead looking back at my laptop which had been abandoned some minutes ago. Youtube is displayed. The video I had been watching is paused. Bromance. Stupid video. Why had I been watching it again?

"I don't. I am not in love with Sean. That's the truth." I say decisively and she just shrugs.

Let me tell you how this started.

Arden had been passing by, and she just thought, hey. Maybe I'll pay my best friend slash ex a visit and talk to him about his obvious feelings towards his other best friend. And my feelings aren't obvious. Wait what? I mean.. they wouldn't be obvious if I have any, that is. Not that I do. That point has been established like, ages ago. Yeah.

"Sean's going out with his girlfriend tonight. A special sort," she says randomly. Most likely just to get a reaction out of me. Not that I'm bothered. Or jealous. Of course not. He has a girlfriend and I'm happy for him. Okay?

"That's nice," I say absently, and she looks frustrated.

"Is that all?"

"Yeah."

I exit Chrome and turn my laptop off. Arden rolls her eyes, mutters something about closets but I don't listen. I hear the front door open and I hear a string of muffled, censored curses from the living room, and I realize that it's Sean.

I stand and leave her to greet my new visitor, grateful for the distraction. Just for that. Really. I'm not over the moon about the fact that Sean came to visit me before his big date. That's just.

"Hey Ryan." He says when he sees me, and I feel my breath catch.

"Hey dude." I reply. And no, my heart isn't beating that fast. And no, it does not stop when I see his smile. Genuine and beautiful and...

"Big date?" I ask, and he nods, smiling softly.

And I don't feel loss. I really don't.

"I'm proposing," he says. And my heart doesn't drop. It's not supposed to. And I'm happy for them. I really am. I'm not jealous. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not-

"You have it bad." Arden's voice echoes in my ear.

I'll stop lying to myself the moment when there's at least a chance that Sean will love me.

How was it?? Was it fine?? Was it bad??

Also Strangers is gonna be updated soon. That is all bye.