Risking the Fall to Gain it All

10; Change is in the Air

I really didn’t understand the homework. I honestly did not understand it. Despite what Jess and Jeremiah think I was not sitting at this desk afterschool trying to get some alone time with Mr. Sawyer. I honest to God did not understand the homework.

Alone time with him was just a bonus.

While Mr. Sawyer explained the essay prompt again with simpler words (He keeps losing me with ‘juxtaposition’) I couldn’t help but stare at his facial features. If I had to guess I’d say he trimmed instead of shaving because there was forever stubble grazing his chiseled chin. His expressive eyes were always looking around with so much intensity it just made you wonder what went on in his mind. When he was happy it was a powerful concentration of fulfillment that spilled from his emerald eyes. When he was disappointed or angry his gaze could probably physically hurt whomever it landed on.

Now, when it was just me and him, his eyes were cautious and always darting around. Almost as if he was afraid of me.

“So you just have to take a side and argue on whether or not a monarchy would be more efficient in today’s day and age or if it was better back when it was all we had.”

With a slow nod I reread the prompt and smiled, “It makes a whole lot more sense now.”

Mr. Sawyer clapped his hands and a huge grin plastered his face, “Great! Now I can get home to Beau before he devours my chips again.”

I rolled my eyes, “You’re not still blaming me for that? It was, what, three weeks ago?”

“So? I haven’t had time to go out and buy any more.”

“Then how is he going to devour your Doritos?”

“Did I say Doritos?” Mr. Sawyer pointed to himself, then to me, “You said Doritos. I said chips.”

“Same difference.”

“You would say that.”

He stood up from the chair he had pulled in front of my desk and started back to his own desk. I remained at my seat and just watched him. He picked up papers and placed them into neat piles, and then he picked up a red pen and dropped it in his drawer. Within seconds his desk was bare except the meticulously straight pile of papers and his nameplate.

“You are a really tidy person.” I commented while thinking of my trashed desk at home.

Mr. Sawyer shrugged, “I’ve had this obsession with cleanliness thing since I was a boy.”

“I bet your parents were happy.”

His eyes strayed from me. Thinking he didn’t get what I meant I continued, “They never had to tell you to clean your room. Score.”

A darkness clouded his eyes as he stared out the window.

The reason he got clammy out of nowhere hit me and I felt horrible.

“They died?” I asked quietly.

“What?” His head shot towards me, his eyes wide and confused.

“Are they dead? Is that why you got quiet all of a sudden?”

“What?! No! I was just thinking.” He chuckled awkwardly, “They are very much alive.”

I noticed his voice hardened when he spoke, “Is everything okay between you guys?”

His eyes intensified as they gazed at me, “Not really.”

“I don’t mean to step out of my place…” I leaned forward against my desk.

“It’s nothing. But hey,” He glanced at his wrist watch, “I think it’s time I left. You’re sure you understand the homework, because I’m not going to be lenient when I grade these.”