Part Fourteen: 701 - 750

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<pre class="letterbox">701:- Professor Snape is in no way related to Ozzy Ozbourne.

702:- Draco Malfoy is not Billy Idol.

703:- Nor is he an Albino.

704:- Nor will I tell the first years this.

705:- I am not to tell First years that Dumbledore is Santa's brother.

706:I am not to imply that if Hogwarts had a special needs group then Dumbledors sister could

have gotten help.

707:I am not to ask the house elves if the Griffindors could have Cheetos and Doritos with dinner.

708:I cannot ask the house elves to carve the ham into a human head and serve it to Slytherin.

709:-Nor any other body part.

710:I will not spread the rumor that Umbridge was muggle born.

711:I won't put new born babies under the sorting hat just to confuse it.

712:I will not put owls under the sorting hat just to confuse it.

713:I will not ask which house Dumbldore was in.

714: nor will I suggest that he was in the wrong one, for we all know he is incredibly brave and

extremly clever.

715:I will not ask Mrs. Pince to find me the manga section.

716:I will not bet on how many paper planes stick in professer snapes hair.

717:I did not see Pansy in the Slytherin common room singing 'I Kissed A Girl' and I should

stop telling people that I did.

718:-I also did not see her singing 'Pansylicious'.

719:-The same goes for Hermoine

720:- I will not stand in the middle of the great hall and sing, "I may be a tiny chimney sweep

but I have an enormous...broom"

721:- Nor anywhere else for that matter.

722:- I am not aloud to sing the aforementioned song at all.

723-I will not go down to the kitchens, get a bowl of grapes, and then make them peel them for me.

724-No aligators. No exceptions.

725-I will not challenge Aragog and his mate to a "14 legged race" no matter how

 fun the out come would be.

726-Demanding to the Minister why wizards weren't out magicly helping the Giant

Panda populations is highly frowned upon.

728-writing a buisness letter about it doesn't stop it from being rude.

729-Writing TWO buisness letter likewise changes nothing.

730-even if I did say "Dear" at the begining.

731-There has never been and there isn't now a great lord Waldemart and you

are discouraged from voicing that idea in front of Voldemort

732-You are also greatly discouraged from saying that he is the greatest wizard in

the world because Voldemort might not respond do that too kindly.

733-Screaming out "I saw Harry and Draco down in the dungeons snogging each other"

 in the middle of the great hall is not appropriate.

734-Nor in any other place

735-Even if everyone finds it amusing

736-Using wizard swears inside the walls of hogwarts is also forbidden even if

Dumbledore has forgotten he set this rule.

737-Selling photoshoped pictures of Harry and Voldemort making out is not a way to earn money.

738-Even every student buys them and sticks them up on their walls.

739-Turning Draco Malfoy into a ferret is not funny anymore.

740-Casting the Imperius curse to make him transfigure himself into a ferret is

even less appropriate.

741-Enchanting mistletoe to take up the properties of devil snare is not funny.

742-Enchanting the armour around Hogwarts to barge into Slytherin Common

Room and start singing "Ding dong, the heir of Slytherin is dead" or "Ding, dong, Voldemort is

dead" the night Voldemort is defeated is not allowed.

743-Nor is enchanting them to go to Gryffindor Common Room and sing "Ding, Dong, James

and Lily Potter are dead"

744-Telling first years that at the end of the year they have to do an exam involving

a three-headed dog, devil snare, an oversized chess board, flying keys, and a table

of potions, one which will kill you, and then in the end battling the DADA professor,

who has he-who-must-not-be-named bluging out on the back of his head is not funny, or

allowed.

745-Enchanting a bludger to hit Crabbe or Goyle on the back of the head to see if

they have any brain cells to loose is not considered an appropriate Charms homework

experiment .

746-Even if the it proves that they don't.

747-I will not cast the imperius curse on Snape and make him sing 'I'm sexy and i know it' and

strip of his shirt no matter how amusing the idea is.

748-Nor will i charm him to sing 'I feel pretty' and dance around with the moves from

Bet On It no matter what youtube video i got the idea from.

749-I will never destroy anything with my magic until after class.

750: I will never use Harry Potter's husk as a doll to fool the Hogwart's members with.</pre>

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