Snapshots

Thirty Eight

Viviana waved her friend off and rushed to class. Ms. Jenkins smiled at her as she entered the room and took her seat. Once again, Viviana noticed the pitiful look on her teacher's face. All her instructors bore it whenever she was near. All had offered to listen to her should she need it but Viviana couldn't articulate to any of them what was on her mind. How could she tell them what she really wanted when she wasn't even sure what that was?

Viviana took a steadying breath and began her exam which required her to compare and contrast one American, French and English poet from the turn of the 17th century. While this was not her most liked subject, she had prepared and immediately began writing. She only had this final today and then nothing else until Thursday which was her big exam, AP Anatomy.

With fifteen minutes to spare, Viviana closed her composition book. She smiled at Ms. Jenkins as she placed it on the desk and walked out. She carefully avoided the crowd of eager students, ready to disembark from school and made her way to the parking lot before she could be stopped. She found herself driving and before she knew it, she was in front of the 1369 Coffee House. She chuckled to herself and found parking.

The coffee house was just a little over a mile from Harvard University, where her mother taught in the math department. Marie had often brought her there to sip the café's signature hot chocolate while they visited about the goings on in their lives. It was funny to Viviana that she found herself there today. She glanced around, almost hoping that her mother would be around but unfortunately she wasn't.

"Hey Viv, it's been awhile," the perky barista stated as Viviana approached her.

"Yeah, school's been keeping me away." It amazed her that she was able to lie so easily. "I'll get a Spiced Americano and one of the blueberry muffins."

"You got it."

Viviana paid and found a spot to sit. It was still early enough that it wasn't extremely crowded, although more people were starting to trickle in. She pulled out her Anatomy study guide and slowly read through each of her note cards. By the time she had run through the first few cards a second time they had called her name.

Viviana tried her best to review but her mind kept drifting. She fluctuated between memories of her father, his burial and then as it usually did, riding Eagle Bear. When Eagle Bear let her on him, she had been beyond shocked but when he had begun to run with purpose she felt something else. While she had been terrified, she had also been invigorated with life and energy. In that moment she was happy and free, it was something she hadn't felt since returning home.

Eagle Bear stopped running, unable to push himself any further. Viviana felt her heart racing uncontrollably as she lowered her head, grasping the panting horse around the neck. His heart was racing as well. She could hear the steady thrumming in her ear, bringing her much needed peace of mind. She wasn't sure how but Eagle Bear seemed to know exactly what she needed and gave it to her.

"Thank you Eagle Bear."

"Viv," her mother stated, placing a hand on her shoulder. "Were we meeting today? Did I forget?"

"Ummm, no, I just..." Her brows scrunched together and she shook her head. "I just finished my Lit final and thought I'd come here to study."

Marie smiled and glanced down at the uneaten muffin and coffee that was likely cold by now. The notecards she always made to study with were strewn along the table, untouched. She wondered how long her daughter had been sitting there, gazing off. She took a seat across from her and gave her a small smile as she set her satchel onto the seat beside her.

"You seemed lost in thought when I came in," Marie stated as a matter of fact.

Viviana didn't reply, she simply picked up the coffee and took a sip, frowning at how cold it was. She realized that she must have been daydreaming for longer than she had initially thought. She found herself picking at her muffin, crumbling little pieces onto the plate, unable to meet her mother's thoughtful and worried eyes.