Mistakes

A nice, happy family

It's been about four months since I tried to... You know..do it, and I now have all my casts off and only scars to remind me of that day. Emily and I are still friends even though she's like 10 years older than me. I live in a 'girls home' or orphanage now and it doesn't bother me much. I go to therapy and stuff for my ongoing depression but I haven't cut in a while...well maybe a week or so, I still don't eat much though. I miss Jack a lot but I haven't been able to contact him since now I go to a different school in a different city and we have to be back here right after school.

I rubbed my eyes and grabbed my phone. Thank god it's Saturday cause I slept in late.
I heard a knock on my door and Emily walked in with Starbucks for both of us. I got up and have her a hug "thanks em"

"No problem! I have some great news!" She said handing me my coffee.

"What is it"

"Well I was just told that a family from America contacted Elise (the lady that runs the orphanage) and she wants to adopt you!"

"Really?!
Why?
Does she know about my past?
Is she okay with it!?"

"Yes she does and she said that she is fine with it, I heard that she has a son that is as old as you and a husband and they all live together in Los Angeles! She's gonna be here tomorrow to meet you and possibly take you back!"

"I'm going to miss you though em!"

"I'll miss you too but we will skype whenever you want and I'll visit you!"

"Okay!" Emily is like my sister now, I really don't want to leave her but this family wants to adopt me... I need this.

She stayed for a while and we watched Netflix and stuff together and then she left for work.

Elise walked in and smiled "so lily I'm guessing Emily told you about the family?"

"Yup" I smiled too

"They seem great, the woman and her husband and son are going to be here tomorrow to meet you, are you ready?"

"Yes I cant wait"

"Then you better get some sleep, they will be here around 1 pm tomorrow so be ready and look your best!"

"Okay goodnight"

"Goodnight lily" she said as she walked out.

I kinda have mixed emotions about this whole being adopted thing. I know I haven't seen Sean in forever but still... I'm never going to see him again if I move, but this is my only chance to live with a family that loves me.
I have to take it.

I fell asleep and dreamt of having a loving, normal family. It sounded great. I hope they like me. I hope my brother is nice. I hope California is just as beautiful as everyone says it is.
But overall I hope I see Sean again some day.

I woke up to my alarm and rolled out of bed into the floor. "Ahh shite that fukin hurt" I said quietly while rubbing my head. I jumped up and started getting ready.

I don't dress very nice, like you're lucky if you see me wearing something besides sweats.

Today I have to dress nice-ish though so I put on my black ripped jeans, a blue sweatshirt, a gray beanie, and my black converse. I brushed my hair out and left it wavy. Last I put on my eyeliner and mascara, I don't want to wear any other makeup cause I like my freckles.