Sisterly Love

Speaking in Code

"Yea...you."

Holy shit. I was totally not expecting that. Did she say that on purpose? Just to get a rise out of me? Or did she actually mean it? Fuck! It doesn't really matter how she meant it because, let's be honest, I'm totally going to play it off as though she meant it. But what do I say?! It's not like I can just propose that we have sex on sight or run off with her to a courthouse immediately.

"Uhmm Alison?" Emily called out to me, breaking me out of my thoughts. I'm not sure whether to be grateful or not for that. A part of me is because I was beginning to get too consumed in my thoughts. However, the other part of me wished she'd let me be so that I could continue to think of a master plan for how to respond.

"Yes?" I replied as I continued to look down at the menu. There's no way that I could look her in the eye right now.

"Are you going to say something?" She nervously asked.

"I'm sorry. I didn't quite catch what you said," I lied as I finally looked up from my menu. Damn it! She's staring right at me with a face full of innocence.

"I said yes. How about you?" she answered as she lightly chuckled at my fake confusion.

"How about me what?" I asked, now I'm really confused.

"Are you always this funny?" she joked, "You asked me if I saw something that I liked, so I said 'Yea...you?'. In return, I am asking you the same question."

Wow. I definitely feel like the ultimate loser right now. How could I have possibly thought that she was actually referring to me and admitting to liking me just a couple minutes ago? Way to go, Alison!

"Oh uhmm yea...I think I'm gonna stick to the eggs benedict that I spoke of earlier," I dryly stated as I thought about everything that just happened. Maybe I just need to give up on Emily. She clearly has no desire to be with me whatsoever. And ever since I met her, I've been treating my actual girlfriend like shit.

"Is everything okay, Ali?" Emily asked, her voice full of concern.

No. Everything is not okay.

"Yea. Everything's fine," I sighed.

"Is it about Hanna?"

No. It's about you.

"Yea. I guess I'm just now realizing how bad I fucked up," I sort of lied. I mean it is kind of true because I did fuck up. Now who I fucked up with and how doesn't really matter.

"You didn't mess up that bad. You still have a chance with her, I just know it," she smiled as she grabbed a hold of my hand from across the table and rubbed my knuckles with her thumb.

Okay, let's back the hell up real quick! Is she...is she...nah. Couldn't be! Let me not even put that thought into the air. Just a couple minutes ago, I thought she really liked me like that and I was wrong. So why in the hell would I think that Emily is referring to herself right now and flirting with me? What the fuck is wrong with my brain? I'm pretty sure it's time to get a new one. Do they sell brains on Amazon?

"How can you be so sure?" I asked her as I sat up a bit straighter. I guess the only way to figure things out is to play on her words.

"Well I'm a girl and I know what it feels like to really be into someone. The second that they do something you don't agree with, you feel hurt and betrayed. Out of instinct, you either say things to hurt them back, leave or you do both," she answered as she continued to hold intense eye contact with me. Okay...what the fuck was that?! Is she still even talking about me and Hanna. Or me and her?

"Are you insinuating that I'm not a girl? I mean so what I have a dick, but I still have a nice set of D's for you to play around with whenever you're ready," I smirked at her and she looked stunned, "I'm kidding, Em. Well about the dick anyway...I think. The D's are still up for grabs, literally," I winked at her.