Chapter 1

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The day had come. It was either kill himself, or quit his job. The thing was, he couldn't quit without committing career suicide. He was Koty Jackson, lead heart throb in ESX. Their debut album, Temperature Rising, was #1 on the charts, and their hit single "Heat You Up" played everywhere. They were due to start touring in two days, and Koty was pretty sure that if he did go on tour, he would eat a bullet, or something equally violent and life-threatening.

He leaned against the vanity in the dressing room. His reflection stared back at him from the mirror: blue eyes flecked with green, black spiked hair, and a five o'clock shadow. He wore a too-big white tank top over a purple one and a brown fedora—what his stylist claimed all the guys were wearing. He felt like something out of a Hollister commercial. Even worse, he felt like a poser.

At home, only Levis and band tees filled his dresser drawers: Megadeth, Nico Vega, The Dillinger Escape Plan. An acoustic guitar leaned against the wall, and a Peavey amp sat in his living room. In his studio apartment, there was no trace of ESX—not even a single fedora. If he had it his way, he would have signed with a real band, one that was made up of instruments and actual talent. Instead, his agent had determined that his smoky voice and good looks were a one-way ticket to boy band hell.

It wasn't like Koty hadn't tried to escape. His agent, Raymond Eble, had smoothed his Armani suit, sniffed at Koty's ripped jeans, and told him that no one would take him seriously if he tried to do any other kind of music. It would be, in Raymond's words, "akin to trying to get on Barney after being convicted for molesting children."

Koty didn't think it was that serious, but Raymond had been in the business for well over ten years. He knew what he was talking about—probably. The man was somewhat competent, as he had gotten Koty a contract that was making him a lot of money. If Koty wanted to, he could move out of his studio and out to LA, where ESX's label was. The last thing he wanted was to be closer to ESX, though.

A knock rapped at the door, interrupting his thoughts.

"On in five," called a male voice that Koty didn't recognize.

Right—he was supposed to be appearing on Late Nite with Maz. He rolled his eyes. In just a few minutes, he needed to put on a panty-melting smile and talk about how much he was looking forward to being on tour with Dev, Johnny Z, and Benny—none of whom could even carry a tune, never mind play an instrument. They had no idea who Kurt Cobain or Brent Hinds were. Koty was pretty sure that Dev was secretly gay, despite his legions of female fans. Johnny Z probably had at least three STDs. And then there was Benny, whose red glassy eyes made Koty think he was doing more than smoking a little pot.

ESX was a grenade waiting to hit a wall, and Koty was caught in the middle. He might as well swallow the explosive.

He yawned and scrubbed at the stubble on his face with his hands. He still wasn't used to LA time, no matter how often he visited. Sometimes he wondered what life would be like if he had kept playing street corners and moonlighting as a bartender. Sometimes he wondered if he had made a huge mistake.

Another knock at the door echoed through the dressing room.

Koty crossed the room and opened the door. He wished he could wear sunglasses to the interview. On the bright side, none of the other members of ESX were appearing that night. For once, he could enjoy some peace and quiet—sort of.

The audience screamed as he walked onto stage. Grip boys held boom mikes, and all of the cameras were pointed at him. He smiled and waved, and the women in the audience screamed louder. He glanced through the crowd. Some had smuggled in posters.

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