When they said my solo was third place in the junior division at the competition, of course I was upset. I had gotten third place before but I worked really hard and I wanted to win the whole thing because my dad is here and he never gets to come and see me dance. And when I was dancing the song made me think of my parents and how their relationship used to be before they got divorced and everything got all weird. While I was dancing I could've sworn that I saw them holding hands in the audience and it made me really happy. But now I'm just upset because I wanted my dad to see me win.
"Hey lovebug, what's wrong?" Mom asked as she was helping me take my hair down in the dressing room. I didn't want to cry in front of my teacher or my teammates because then they would call me a brat and say that I'm ungrateful. But I'm not. Is it bad that I just wanted my dad to see me win with a dance that I worked really hard on?
"Nothing...where's dad?" I wiped the makeup off of my face and smiled when it was all gone. I love putting on competition makeup and it makes me look really pretty, but I don't like wearing makeup all the time because mom says I'm pretty without it and I don't need it to be beautiful. She says that a lot too, so it must be true.
"He's waiting outside for us. We have some time before the jet is ready so we could get some dinner to celebrate your win," Mom suggested, combing through my curls as I shook my head.
"I didn't win though." I'm such a cry baby and I hate it. Even when I tell myself that I'm not going to cry I still do. And it's just that I cry when I'm sad. I cry when I'm angry too and it's just so stupid. I need to learn to control my emotions.
"Gabi-" mom didn't get to finish her sentence because I got up and walked out of the room, thinking that I would be alone to get myself together in the hallway but my dad was literally right outside.
"You guys ready to - Gabi, what's wrong?" Dad asked, kneeling down to my height because I'm not that tall yet, even though I want to be.
"Nothing," I said as I wiped my eyes with the back of my hand and tried to control my breathing. Mom is always worried about my breathing because of my asthma but she's over dramatic.
"You're crying. There's obviously something wrong." Mom walked out of the room and came next to us and I just started crying even harder.
"I really wanted to win today because I worked really hard and I wanted you to see me win but I lost. I don't like losing," I cried as my dad pulled me in for a hug and did that thing that he always does where he kisses my forehead and runs his hand over my hair. I don't know why but it always makes me feel better.
"You didn't have to win for me to see that you were amazing. And you beat some girl that's two years older than you, Gabi. You were amazing," Dad said as he wiped my tears away.
"Gabi, sometimes you work really hard and you put in your best effort and you still lose. You're never too good to lose. We all lose sometimes, but that doesn't mean you stop trying. Take it from us," Mom finished for him as dad nodded and I finally got myself together. If Jasmine saw me she would be so ashamed.
"Okay..." I said as I nodded and finished wiping my face off. This is why my parents need to be together. If it had just been my mom here I probably would've cried the entire way home. But with my dad here he was able to say the things that she couldn't. They needed to be together. They just had to be.
I don't know what happened between the time that we left the competition and waited for the jet to get ready, but my parents aren't talking. At all. They won't even look at each other. They're not even sitting next to each other. It's like we made all this progress and now there's just nothing.
