Skinny Love

8. Stay or Go?

"You better not be dumping me, Hadley. I won't let it happen," she shook her head and I cracked a small smile. She was really only thinking about that?

"Don't worry, it's not that. But it is something that's pretty serious and I need you to swear that you won't tell a single soul and that you will let me finish before you but in and try to say something. Okay?" I rose an eyebrow slightly at her as I slide into the seat across from her. My elbows rested against the table as I rubbed at my eyes, trying to think of a way to word that I was leaving for Thirteen before dawn. I had to make my move tonight. I needed to join the rebels well before the Reapings in order to have a chance at getting my family and loved ones out of Two. Heck, I'll even try to get the Greenleafs out.

"I don't care. I need you to tell me whatever it is right now. It's pissing me off that you're acting so weird about whatever it is you're hiding from me. I thought that we don't keep secrets from each other, babe." Andrea frowned at me and gave me a slight glare at the end of it. I let out a sigh and rubbed at my eyes even more. I wanted to just lay down with here again and hold her closer.

"Andrea, I've been in contact with the rebels from Thirteen for a while now. They want me to head out there now and get started on the training as soon as possible. Which mean, they want me out there within the next few days. I'm leaving before dawn comes tomorrow." I looked up at her and frowned slightly when she just stared at me blankly for a while. It was like she didn't know what to say to me.

"When are you going?" Her eyes looked away from me and it was clear she was doing her best to just process the fact that I was going off to join the rebels that were starting to grow more and more in numbers each day. It took me a few moments to consider if I was even going. It would mean that Cato and my entire family would be put at risk. It would mean that she would be put at risk... Did I want to go just so I could help fight in a way that can end up getting me killed? Am I even confident enough in myself to travel across the nation without getting caught by Peacekeepers on the way to Thirteen? I don't see how likely that's going to be. We don't send that many people out to the further Districts until it gets around the day of the reaping. It was still a few days away. I had a chance at reaching Thirteen before every District was swarming with Peacekeepers. But once they realize that I'm gone, I'm screwed. They'll be sending search party after search party to hunt me down and bring me back. They'll go as far as using my family and Andrea to draw me out of hiding. I can't go to the rebels and then leave. They could see that as an act of treason and throw me into a jail cell then forget about me. I really won't be able to make sure that Andrea stays safe after that then... Am I willing to put the lives of everyone I love on the line just to fight to end the Games?

"I don't know... It would be a few weeks before the reaping though. I would need to give myself enough time to get to Thirteen before the reaping. It won't be long before the District and the trainers at the Academy notice that I'm not there. I'll need to be far enough away so that it'll take them a few days to organize a search party of any kind. I just don't know if I'm willing to risk putting everyone here in even more danger by going. They'll be going after you to draw me out. To get me killed..." I sighed softly and looked down at the table, trying to make up my mind before she had the chance to insist that she comes with me. It was oddly quiet on her side of the table, but her hand reached across to hold onto mine.

"You going is enough for me. Some of us are at risk one way or another with our names being in that reaping bowl. Even with the tributes and volunteers having been decided for this year. Things can always change if something happens that doesn't go the way that the Peacekeepers want it to go. You need to look past that and realize that you'll be taking the chance to end the Games by going to fight with them. You'll give us a chance to have a life together. To have a family together once we're no longer forced to train everyday of our lives up until the moment that we make it through our last reaping of our lives. You need to go. Don't tell anyone else. Leave during the weekend. I'll give them a reason to be looking the other way when you go." She gave my hand a squeeze before leaning across the table. Her lips touched mine for a brief moment. It felt like mere moments before she pulled away and stood up from the table.

"Are you sure about this? You'll be in danger just for loving me... I don't want you to go through that. I don't want any of you to go through that." I stood up with her and she smiled at me.

"Of course. I'm positive. You make it sound like none of us have the same training as you. I can fend for myself and I'm sure as hell that Cato'll be able to do the same. Everyone here will be fine and can fend for themselves. You go and help to put an end to all of this." Her voice was soft as she hugged me tightly. It felt like we had been married for years with the way that she was telling me not to be afraid of taking the greatest risk there could be of joining the rebels in Thirteen.
"Ms. Smith... You're wanted at the Mayor's house immediately." Joseph, the head of the Peacekeepers stood before us and his gaze was cold while he looked on in disgust of the two young kids that were showing a sign of affection in a public place.

"Of course. I'll go grab my..." She trailed off when she noticed the look that Joseph was giving her. "Or I can just leave it upstairs until I get back." She nodded and gave me a brief kiss on the cheek before heading towards the door.

"I would think that the younger brother of someone with the honor of being the volunteer this year would be obeying the laws a little more closely than you have been lately. We're watching you, Logan Hadley." Joseph turned and left as suddenly as he had came, taking Andrea with him. She had turned back to look at me before being ushered out of the front door.

I hated the laws that said no public affection. It didn't make you weak. It built you up more than anyone could possibly understand. People had turned to look at me from where they were sitting throughout the bar. It was for only a few seconds before they all looked away, but Father kept his eye on me. He was waiting for me to snap and say something that could get me tied to the post and whipped in the town square that very instant. I need to bite my tongue until I had the chance to fight for everything that I couldn't stand in this country. Panem was run by a dictator that needed to be overthrown by the people. I waited for Father to look away before cracking my knuckles to calm myself down. I'm going to fight in this war... I'm going to make sure that Andrea never has to be summoned at random. I know that she needs my protection, but she told me that she could handle herself. She also told me that she would be the distraction that I needed to escape the District and start the journey to Thirteen

My eyes drifted off to the contact that I had with the rebels in Thirteen and I gave him a slight nod, confirming that I was going back with him when he left. He barely showed the sign of acknowledgement before taking a sip of his beer again. I headed upstairs to the house and ran a hand through my hair, trying to think of how I was going to make it there alive.