Rat - YA Fantasy

21

    The Grand Master frowned. "You must promise me that you will not go seek him out on your own."

    I swallowed. I didn't want to make such a promise, because that was exactly what I had intended to do – to go seek this Quintoxe fellow on my own, to even up the score with my own methods. I was so young, and yet my soul was so bitter and twisted. I longed to hear the screams of the man who had made me fail and taught me the meaning of pain.

    If I could not make the King suffer, I would make Quintoxe suffer, and I would see his agony with my own eyes. "All right," I lied, "it's a promise."

    The Grand Master looked at me quizzically, as if my thoughts were clear to him. They probably were. He didn't trust me in exactly the same way I didn't trust him.

    "Mr. Grand Master," I said, trying to change the subject, and also because there was something I needed to ask. "I wonder," the old man waited for me to ask, "why does the King hate Cooper so much?"

    "Ah," he settled back, "it is a long and short story, as old as any story that involves Kings. He despised Cooper because he is a weak King, and weak Kings, as a rule, hate strong men."

    "Did he kill Cooper?"

    "Kill him? No, he never would." The Grand Master stroked his chin thoughtfully, "He needed Cooper to protect the Kingdom. But that was precisely what made him grow insane with jealousy and hatred. And it didn't help that Cooper spoke so openly about his opinions concerning Kings, concerning women's rights, concerning the whole monarchial system. He was a creative lad, always seeking new ways to improve things. That was what made him a spectacular magician."

    "Did Cooper hate the King?"

    The Grand Master smirked bitterly. "He had good reason to. But he was always smartly playing a game, like an actor upon a stage."

    "What was his reason?"

    The Grand Master shook his head. "Don't trouble yourself with it."

    "I'm already troubled by it," I insisted. "I'll find out, even if you won't tell me."

    The old man exhaled dramatically, making it clear that I was nagging him. "Then try then and find out if you like. It is not widely known, Cooper was discreet about many things."

    "I wonder if Cooper dying was his way of getting revenge on the King," I thought out loud. The old man's eyes widened at my remark, he stared at me.

    "Why would you say that?"

    I shrugged, I really didn't have a reason for saying most things. Words tended to travel from wherever words were formed straight to my mouth without consulting my thoughts.

    "He would never," the old man said, "kill himself intentionally." There was something very closed off about the way he said it, as if he didn't want to discuss it any farther.

    And then suddenly, I glimpsed something I didn't intend to see and the Grand Master didn't wish to show. My eyes simply went right through what they saw and, thrusting forward like a knife, into the old man's soul. And there, there I found pain, terrible pain.

    It made me shudder and look away. He an old man; he couldn't be allowed such emotions. I was surprised to realise how well such a strong emotion was being hidden, yet now I understood that it was present in everything he did, in every moment I was next to him. And then, as if the glimpse I had caught was a flower bud in my mind, it began unfolding, opening up, unraveling, revealing the source of this pain.

    A wave of pity towards him overcame me; he didn't even notice that I knew what he was hiding so cleverly.

    He was hurting. He was melancholy. He missed Harlock Cooper so badly.

    Yet more than that, even stronger, was his unbearable remorse. But remorse for what? What was it that the Grand Master regretted doing, or not doing? I wondered about the mystery of Cooper's death, and the questions the Grand Master had, questions about himself. I now knew him well enough to see that even when he asked a question with no apparent answer, he was already forming a theory in his mind.

    Did his theory of Cooper's death make him regret?

    I looked out the window. It was late morning and the sun was shining brightly. Autumn was here, and soon the rains would start and the sun would hide for many months. I had to catch it when it was still burning. "I think I want to go out for a walk," I said in a strained voice.

    The Grand Master gave me an odd look. "That will be for the best," he agreed.

A/N - This was another favourite scene of mine. Going back to Rat after not touching it for over three years, I can't remember my thought process while writing this, so I was surprised by how wise Marning can sound. Also, I love their relationship and the contrast there is between the old man who has learned to hide his pain and his true feelings as opposed to the boy who is nothing but raw emotion. I knew I wanted to achieve something along those lines and I wonder if I'm the only one who was moved by this scene.