Professor C (camren)

16 - Jauregui (Part 1)

Love is probably one of the most beautiful things in the world but when it fails, it's the most excruciating.

"Milo looks like you somehow; her bearing, her clothing. She even has green eyes and Camila got with her." Dinah tried in the hopes of pacifying the tension that was brought about by Lauren reliving her past, which was partially her fault. "I know they're lighter but come on, Lauren. You two were both in a bad place and were only hoping to get over a love that nobody thought would end. I guess you guys were just trying to forget the other while remembering them at the same time because you guys never really wanted to let go. And that's confusing but I understand. It would have been a problem if you guys were fine after everything. I worried so much but I would have been worrying more then."

Lauren nodded, having difficulty formulating words upon comprehending what Dinah was getting at. She had never looked at it that way before considering she had always found Milo obnoxious and oddly hospitable. It was only then that she contemplated on Milo's character and aura, even recalling the way she dressed.

Without her jealousy in the way, which was the root cause of her prejudice, Lauren saw Milo in a different light.

And unfortunately, minus the sense of imprudence, the lack of maturity and responsibility holding her down, they were almost the same people. Because at one point, Lauren was like Milo. However, even the younger version of the green-eyed brunette was saved from a phase of releasing tactless comments, which Milo is still very inclined to do so.

At least, Lauren is a little more polished and poised than Camila's other ex-girlfriend.

"I genuinely started to fall for this girl in my senior year and I thought we had something." All too suddenly, Lauren solemnly shared.

She was wistfully and absentmindedly staring at the impressive calligraphy embossed on the leather cover. Her brooding temperament and the sudden resurfacing of her voice surprised Dinah, who was eager to listen on. The Polynesian had lost interest in the menu - pushing it to the side, and immediately devoted all her attention to her Lauren and what she was about to say. She was also mindful about searching for the best way to console Lauren should it become unbearable.

Lauren figured that talking about her past would still be the same experience whether she immediately dealt with it or put it off another day. It would still be the same embarrassment and bitterness, but the most significant difference would be that she'd be free of its burdens sooner.

There was a commotion in her chest that harassed her throat and drew moisture away from her mouth. It was getting harder to breathe and her trepidation delayed the process to the point that Lauren almost backed away. Almost.

Taking a deep breath, Lauren worked on moistening her lips and reached for her goblet once more. Gulping down, she looked up to meet Dinah's gaze.

It was time.

"Her name was Roxanne and she helped me turn my life around. She started to hang around my room for a couple of weeks, just to make sure I don't pick up beer and make sure I ate enough. I was gaining weight from it – the beer, I mean and it wasn't the healthy kind. She stayed with me at night when I couldn't sleep and helped me with my classes until she just asked me out on a date." Lauren shrugged and for a brief moment, her face lit up and her lips traced a soft smile.

"I said yes even if I had reservations. It turned out to be one of my better decisions all throughout college. We dated around five months and I was very loyal to her. We were happy and that was the happiest I had ever been in a couple of years. I really tried and by then, missing Camila wasn't as hard even if I was still worried about her. Roxanne was so sweet and I was so sure that falling in love with her was a fast process. I just knew that I'd just suddenly feel that I have given her my heart and I was actually looking forward to it because for once, when I looked at my future, it didn't seem like a drab. And my heart was the only thing that she didn't have."