Fix A Heart

Kabanata 9

Kabanata 9

"You're quiet, is something bothering you?" Lumingon ako kay Arsen at pilit na ngumiti bago umiling.

When he asked me for dinner ay sumama ako sa kanya, I didn't even say 'good bye' or anything to Zion. I just left him. I know it's rude or mean but I need to deal with Arsen first. Hindi ko naman kasi pwedeng iwan na lang siya bigla or i-reject siya sa harap ng mga employees ko. He's to nice to be embarassed like that. I will reject him properly, ito na lang ang magagawa ko because he really took an effort just to find out where I work.

Dinala ako ni Arsen sa isang Mexican restaurant sa may BGC, he asked me what I want pero hinayaan ko na lang siyang mag-order para sa aming dalawa. Habang naghihintay sa order namin ay nagkukwento siya, I don't know what he's saying dahil okupado ang utak ko but I guess it's a funny story kasi mahinang tumatawa at ngumingiti siya sa akin. Panay lamang ang pagtango at pekeng tawa ko kapag sa tingin ko ay nakakatawa ang sinasabi niya, hindi naman niya ata nahahalata na hindi ako nakikinig dahil hindi naman niya pinupuna.

"Hindi ka ba kakain?" Napatingin ako kay Arsen, hindi ko namalayan na nagspace out na pala ako. I smiled at him at sumubo ng chorizo pasta na in-order niya para sa akin. Wala pang tatlong subo ang nagagawa ko nang ibaba ko ang kubyertos at tinignan siya. He showed me his boyish smile again pero hindi ko iyon sinuklian, then his smile fade. "I know that look. You're gonna dump me."

"I'm not pero kasi..."

"There's that line. Why?" Binaba niya rin ang hawak niyang kubyertos at mukhang disappointed na tinitigan ako.

"I just... I just don't want to entertain someone habang nagmomove on pa ako." I said.

"I'll help you move on." He reach for my hand and squeeze it gently. His hand is rough, dahil na rin siguro iyon sa trabaho niya bilang arkitekto.

"Hindi lang kasi iyon, Arsen. Kahit on the process of moving on pa lang ako ay alam ko sa sarili kong may gusto na akong iba, naghihintay na lang ako sa tamang panahon para pwede ko na siyang gustuhin. I'm just slowly picking up all the broken pieces of my broken heart and fix it. I can't date you because it will be unfair to you. Your a good man, Arsen, I like you pero as a friend lang."

He stare at me, nawala ang pagkaseryoso ng mukha niya at mahinang tumawa. He stopped laughing after a few seconds and showed me his infamous smirk. "Wow! Two rejections in one week." Binitawan niya ang kamay ko tapos ay nagsalin ng wine sa kanyang kopita at ininom ito. "Thanks for being honest, Clarity. Now finish your meal, I'll take you home."

Naging casual ang usapan namin, Arsen never made it awkward at patuloy pa rin sa pagkukwento sa akin, naging maayos na rin sa akin ang makipag-usap sa kanya because I know that he's being real. That he really accepts and respects my rejection. May pinuntahan pa kami ni Arsen na indoor garden bago niya ako hinatid sa bahay. Habang nasa biyahe ay hindi ko maiwasang malungkot because this might be the last that I see him. I rejected him, it's understandable if he doesn't want to see me again.

He opened the car door for me at hinatid pa ako hanggang sa pinto ng bahay ko. Bago ko buksan ang pintuan ay hinarap ko muna siya. "So?"

"Call me when you're bored."

"You still want to see me?"

"Clary, it's one date. I can deal with your rejection without being bitter about it; besides, you're my friend so if you need anything or just someone to talk to, you can call me. Okay?" He softly tap my shoulder.