♡ adrien agreste x fem! reader : philophobia ♡

despondent

// after many hours of drafting here it is you're wlecome

♚ Your P.O.V.♚

I hesitated. "Sure." I smiled, a voice at the back of my mind screaming refusal. 

He smiled back, adorably, chuckling at an idea. "Well, just don't spill coffee on me again, but the cafe is closest, if you want to..." He put a hand in his pants pocket. "Hopefully nothing happens, but it is closest." I looked at his eyes again, my entire mind trying to stop me.

It's happening today.

I've already taken the first step to conquering philophobia, and this is the point of no return. I'm not gonna be scared anymore about something so common.

If this doesn't work, I'm gonna regret it so much.

The only thing I have to do is remove the feeling of fear and the need to cringe, and it'll be gone! That's my theory, at least. 

I breathe out slowly and memorize the plan once more in my head, absentmindedly walking beside Adrien along the sidewalk. We were on our way to the cafe, since it was the only semi-romantic thing nearby. I was nervous as heck, probably because of my bad luck with coffee. Whatever I do, I can't spill it again or I'm done for.

Take away the feeling of fear.

I take another deep breath, watching the cars pass by the small street. Adrien noticed my worry. "Are you okay? We can stop if you want to." He laughs awkwardly. "No, no, it's okay..." I reply, not sure exactly how this works. 

This is going terribly. I thought it would be like coup de foudre, love at first sight, but it's just an awkward event. We were silent the entire walk to the cafe, my head spinning and a feeling of overall sickness. My mind was starting to doubt this, and accept that philophobia is a better choice than this. Before I could refuse, we arrived in front of the doors to the cafe and my mind shoved away all the doubts I thought took over me. I smiled when Adrien opened the door for me. Deja vu, I recall that he's done this before.

I was too tired to remember.

I walked into the air-conditioned cafe, the marble floor reflecting the electric lights above. We walked over to the cashier and I looked at the menu above.

I was too tired to think.

"Um...I'll just order an A Emporter." I felt him grab my hand gently when I ordered, my entire body emitting a shiver and an unnamed fear.

Love is terrible, it's a killer in disguise, taking you hostage and placing a gun at your right temple. A Russian Roulette game is the closest it can relate to, and a 1/6 chance of not being heartbroken.

They did that to you, didn't they?

I can still feel the wound on the side of my head. It shatters me like a bullet meeting glass when it wants to, creating the same feeling I felt on that cold, rainy day on the sidewalk, tear staining my shot heart.

My hand was already out of his, and I blinked a few times when I saw two plastic cups in front of me. I was met with a migraine again when I ignored my philophobic feelings and thoughts. I picked up the warm cup and walked out of the building with him, catching a glimpse of a bright yellow jacket and a blonde ponytail. 

I sighed again, realizing that I should just enjoy the moment. I was starting to feel okay about this, not knowing how my mind accepted it. Because of this, I asked him about his classes, starting up a conversation.

"I only take the classes because I want to make my father happy, but to be honest, piaNO." We both laughed.

I finally started to calm down and just ignore the fact that this is a "date". We passed the spot where I found the necklace, and soon we reached the corner where I spilled my coffee on his shirt. For reasons unknown I felt anxious, and I was ultimately terrified. When we turned the corner, my balance betrayed me and I tripped on the uneven pavement. And of course, I fall on Adrien, getting both of our coffee cups to spill and stain both of us.

A bright flash was the next thing I saw, and a cluster of laugher was the first thing I heard, along with the distant and quiet beating of Adrien's heart.

We both looked towards the laughter. A bright yellow jacket, a blonde ponytail gently swinging back and forth because of her chest rising and falling from laughter. A pair of sunglasses sat atop her spoiled head, it's lenses reflecting the sun above. A phone camera was pointed at me, in her hand. Behind her was a shorter girl, a bright ginger bob of hair on her head. Her face was embellished with large, smart glasses and a laughing smile, directed to me. The white headband on her head glimmered in the sunlight above.

Of course it's her.

"Everyone's gonna hate her once they see this!" Chloe brought her other hand to screen. Sabrina observed and they both laughed after a few seconds past. I sat up, getting off of Adrien's body. My face was painted with embarrassment, the air around me perfumed with insecurity. My eyes started developing tears, my heart pouring gallons of adrenaline and mixed emotions. The voices and annoyed shouts were blocked from my ears, tears spilling out of my eyes like a faucet. Another flash, I didn't care.

A few seconds seemed like hours of crying and blurred shouting, ending with faded footsteps. "She's gone, it's okay, (Y/N)." I felt a hand on my shoulder, the faucet still running from my eyes. I was lead to my weakening legs, coffee still sizzling my skin. "Look at me, (Y/N)." My tear-stained eyes flew up to meet his. "I love you. I know you already know it, but..." His face was covered in blush. My mind shifted back to its' philophobic state. I started to panic, my body frozen in fear. He leaned in and touched my lips gently with his, poisoning me with a headache of many confusing things. My mind is at war. I opened my eyes to his pale face.

Adrien Agreste, the man who killed my mind.

♚⇨until next time!⇦♚

// make sure you comment and vote if you love the story so far! feedback is always appreciated ♥

// another thing: shout out to @KittyNoir56 for the idea of chloe taking the pictures! thank so much !! ♥

// and sorry for the late update! show night in the musical i'm in is literally in 5 days and (i wasn't motivated enough) and i'm running out of ideas for the fic ;; yikes

// but ! i'll try to make more ideas and update asap !!