Fetish For The Finite Sequel ~ Fearless Vampire Killers Fanfic

'THIS IS ORGASMIC!'

“what in seven kingdoms is going on?” Drew shouts from the bunk “home? No van invasion!” I exclaim hugging Iris as she gets up “I’ve missed you” she sighs into my chest “i’ve missed you too midget” I smile patting her head affectionately “don’t think for one second I won’t kick your ass if you call me that again” she says darkly “midget.midget.midget.midget” Crilly shouts before realizing she’s turned to hit him and runs out of the van screaming “well thats one way to welcome us” Luke says appearing around the curtain that divides the van “seven kingdoms they woke you up?!” Drew exclaims “stop saying that, what does that even mean?” Nico frowns “Winter is coming” Drew shouts “and it’ll be silver and cold” Crilly screams from outside “STOP WITH THE AFI AND GAME OF THRONES REFERNCES IT IS TOO EARLY FOR THIS SHIT!” Kier exclaims “somebody needs caffeine” India yawns crawling out from under the riser “WHAT THE WHERE THE WHAT – YOU WERE?” Kier exclaims confused “well I didn’t want to share a bed with you degenerates” India giggles stepping out of the van.

 “we appear to be in-” she pauses “Liverpool” she finishes “how did the van get here?” I ask confused “you know I’m not sure” Luke mutters “oh god were you drunk driving you could have killed us all?!” India exclaims climbing back into the van “no I drove” Falkor smiles “OH GOD YOU WERE DRIVING HOW DIDN’T YOU KILL US ALL?!” India shouts in Falkors face “are you even on the insurance?” Crilly asks climbing back in rubbing his head “she hit you?” Kier asks “is that even a question worth asking” Crilly sighs “nope she’s abusive” Luke laughs “oh and the vans insured to be driven by anyone with a license” he adds “How did you get a license again anyway?” I ask Falkor who looks pretty grim, I guess he’s not a morning person. Or maybe he doesn’t like being insulted, either way he doesn’t look pleased.

“I WAS A POLICE OFFICER!” he shouts jumping me “ouch how does that affect your license?!” I scream out from under him “well they did send him on an intense driving course” Crilly laughs “not that it did him much good” Jim shouts high fiving crilly “I don’t know I’d say the atmosphere is pretty intense when he drives- what with the sense of impending doom and all” Nico splutters “SHUT UP! And me being a police officer means you should respect me!” Falkor exclaims “get me some wine then I might respect you” Nico grins “YOU. HAD. WAY. TO. MUCH.WINE.YESTERDAY” Kier cries out “what happened?” Nico asks suddenly intrigued “what didn’t happen” Kier sighs flopping onto the floor. Drew sees this as an opportunity to jump on him and takes it.

Laurences P.O.V:

“Right guys get out!” I shout “what why?!” several voices shout back followed by Crillys sassy remark “shouldn’t they get dressed first?” “shut it Crilly! But yes get dressed then get out it’s time for a British hang over cure” I shout happily getting out of the van. I’m met by a grey city. “well that looks pretty grim” Falkor sighs beside me “it certainly isn’t the prettiest of places” Crilly agrees “good party scene though!” Nico shouts from the van “it’s all parties with you isn’t it?” Kier shouts back at him from inside “PLAY HARD!” Nico shouts back “Christ are you guys dressed already or what” I shout back “nearly!” Kier replies “where are my straighteners?” Kier exclaims exasperated. “Screw this” I mutter jumping back into the van and chucking Kier over my shoulder “WHAT THE HELL?!” he shouts thrashing “Nico lets go” I  shout climbing out of the van again “I AM NOT FIT FOR THE PUBLICS EYES!” Kier screeches “oh shut it you!” I tease hitting him on the shoulder “there is bacon to be had!” Drew exclaims before running off “does anyone know where to get bacon?” Falkor asks always the cynic “ssshhh you the bacon shall reveal itself” Crilly says running off after Drew.

***

“OH GOD IT’S SO GREASY!” India exclaims “I’m going to have a food coma” Luke laughs patting his stomach “THIS IS ORGASMIC!” Crilly shouts but luckily he is muffled by his sandwich “I swear we can’t take you anywhere!” Falkor mocks shaking his head “you just have no concept of how to behave in public” Kier agrees “I do I just choose to ignore it” Crilly grins finishing his sandwich “I am going to get another sandwich anyone want anything?” he asks getting up “wine” Nico deadpans “oh shut it you want more bacon?” Crilly asks hitting him on the head affectionately “yes please” Nico grins flopping back against the chair “you know I could go on tour again” “weren’t you guys on tour last month?” I ask “yeah only a few dates though we’ll work on booking another when we get back” Crilly sighs sitting down before turning to Nico “bacon will be five minutes”

Barrones P.O.V:

Far too soon we’re back at the van and car saying goodbye again “are you sure you guys can’t stay for the show?” I frown sitting on the edge of the van “wish we could mate” crilly says sadly. Iris looks on the verge of tears again “cheer up you” I laugh brokenly lifting her chin so I can see her face. “you guys are coming to the London show?” I ask hope in my voice “if we can afford the petrol yeah” Crilly nods “we could hardly afford the petrol here” Falkor sighs “hopefully the fans will buy some more merch if we ask nicely” Jim says climbing into Falkors car “yeah they’re great like that” Crilly says enthusiastically

 “we can lend you petrol money if you like” Kier says popping his head around the side of the van “we couldn’t possibly-” “seriously dude the pleasures ours!” Kier grins “GUYS WE NEED TO GO!” Luke shouts from the front of the van “see you in five days” Iris says her voice small “that’s hardly any time” Nico reassures her grimacing before getting into Falkors car reluctantly.  Luke beeps the horn and I know we really need to go “I’ll text you” I smile hugging Iris “I know” she smiles “hey tell the guys you’re all welcome to come down to Bristol after tour” Crilly says sympathetically “SHANE GET IN THE FUCKING VAN BEFORE I DRIVE OFF WITHOUT YOU!” Lukes voice booms from the van “that man has tact” I laugh tears in my eyes. Iris gets into Falkors car last and for once the man doesn’t seem to be in a rush to leave. I’m about to wave them off when I feel a pair of arms wrap around my waist and drag me into the van “Hey I was saying bye!” I protest “well you’ll be saying bye to us in a minute!” Laurence shouts leaning forward to shut the door as the van lurches forward.

A/N: so the title may have been a little misleading. Especially after the primark shenanigans, reagrdless here you go another chapter. It's a bit longer than usual so hopefully that makes up for the slightly shorter last chapter. I APOLIGISE PROFUSELY TO ANYONE WHO WAS OFFENDED BY WHAT I SAID ABOUT LIVERPOOL I'M SURE IT'S LOVELY REALLY! I honestly can't help making jokes about Falkors driving, never seen him drive but I hear many bad things. The next few chapters will be more FVK based so hopefully that'll please any of you nompkins who aren't ashestoangels fans for some reason! I uploaded this chapter randomly out of schedule because I'm sad so hopefully I can make somebody happy and that'll cheer me up,

Becki