curious crimson and his charcoal eyes

secrets and hidden feelings

the second meeting with her was predictable. kim jongin was beyond curious of the girl with doe eyes, that reflect youth and a smile that paints the galaxy. and he purposely stayed late that night, to wait just in case, the girl stumbles in.

she did. but this time, she's sober. she is wearing yesterday's clothes but with different t-shirt beneath. she dresses too much like a boy, he mumbles to himself.

"girls don't have to wear skirts and heels, you know"his eyes shoot up to her as she catches him with a smirk. "surprised aren't you? seeing me sober like this"she holds out her arms like she owns the world, and he chortles at the gesture. she acts too much like a boy.

blame jongin for his absent minded self, and she plops down in front of him, propping her head on her hand, a raised eyebrow for her irritation to him. "you know, you judge too much as a guy. are guys normally this petty about girls?"

"it's your fault for being too much like a guy. other guys would also wonder"nah, only kim jongin would wonder. she is right that he is petty about this kind of things. kim jongin is one of those guys that thinks it is only right that girls dress themself in skirts and dresses. you may think that kim jongin is a bit old-fashioned and into traditional cultures, but when it is actually not about that. the girls around him are always the ballerinas who carry themselves in grace and feminity, so a sight such as im yoona is an unusual sight for him.

she grins, eyes crinkling and somehow her right eye smiles brighter than her left. that's the first thing that jongin remembered about her. "now you're talking. i'm yoona, im yoona"it's odd hearing her name for the secondth time after her last night's blabbers. perhaps, she forgot, he thought. and that's the second thing he remembered about her, im yoona.

"i'm jongin, kim jongin"nodding his head in return. she smiles again, and he looks away. he thinks that she smiles too much in front of a guy, but he is careful in keeping that thought to himself for he does not want to see her stop smiling. a strange shiver skulks beneath his skin at his latter thought; kim jongin being entranced by a total stranger whom he never knows.

she looks around the room and stand up to take a few strides around. "what are you doing anyway? in a night this late?"

"just practicing, you know, dancing and stuff"he could see that her eyes are on him. he has been noticing this for a while, but she seems like the type of person who intently listens and at the same time looking at the person talking. he finds it precious that she actually listens to him, and kim jongin is the type of person who appreciates and observes the little things and habits that people have.

"that sounds thrilling!"she clasps both of her hands and walks over to him" "what kind of dance? i don't know much about dancing and stuff but i think there are more to it than the word itself"yoona knows but she still asks. it's nice to know kim jongin from himself than from her observation and memories.

jongin was unsure of telling her. ballet was his passion in life, but many have degraded him for it. for boys don't dance and pirrouette and spin, yet jongin did. "it's nothing extraordinary you know, it's like many other dances-"

"oh, come on jongin, tell me, i'm curious about it-"

fuck it."it's ballet, okay. and laugh all you want! i'm used to it"jongin doesn't need more mocking smiles and laughters in his life. but what yoona is going to do surprise him.

her eyes soften at the latter as he looks down at his hands. she pats his head. "why would i laugh? it's your dream, nothing matters other than that"

jongin feels like crying out of emotions but jongin does not cry in front of girls that are cooler than him.

yes, im yoona is cool and he admits it.

amidst late nights and her watching him dancing, somewhere in between jongin feels a little lighter than he usually is and his moves grow a little softer and elegant like what the ballet demands in the case of beauty. jongin doesn't realize that he is in love with her exaggerated claps and beaming eyes. she shudders whenever he moves as he looks ethereal in motion. there are times when it felt like time stops for jongin as his hair stood in the air for a few seconds then fall gracefully in his head as he continues. there is a certain mystery and subtle darkness and passion hidden in his eyes when he dances and she feels a rush of adrenaline running through her. it was fascinating to watch an artist being born right before her.

jongin tried to teach her ballet, but yoona could not stand in her toes without him holding her but she likes to spin and jump in the air in her pair of beaten-up converse sneakers, that is nothing alike to his.

he learns that yoona is actually a painter and her favourite flower is sunflower and she jokes that she would like to paint him nude someday(jongin doesn't want to, but she persuades him into agreeing in the condition of wearing a towel) because she finds him exotic and his raven skin is something to be proud of in this society in the side of pale skin department. she thinks that being in the minority is exhilirating because most people in the majority side is too afraid of being themselves and they are all scared and angry people in reality.

"what's the fun in being normal anyway?"she plays with the water bottle in her hands, tossing it from one hand from another just to have her hands being busy with something.

"you see them people obeying tules turn out to be? boring"

"well, they are making money. be rich, in results"

"money isn't everything, jongin. you should know that."she frowns and shakes her head in disapproval. "you should not think like that. you won't go far in life with that kind of mind"

he smirks in disbelief. "i think it's the opposite, yoona. your kind of thinking will destroy you someday. be a realist at times, can you?"

her voice is raised in an accusing tone then"hey, i got this far in life because of the way i am right now, jongin"she ends up throwing the bottle at him, half dissapointed and half annoyed with his way of thinking. she was dissapointed with his present self who is nothing like him in the past, but she keeps it to herself. she's not ready. yoona isn't.

lucky him for catching it at the right time and place it behind his back, far away from her reach. he sighs at her childish demeanour"you have to be a little crazy to match up with how crazy life actually is"she goes on.

a roll in the eyes is only his answer. "whatever, then. it's not like me talking will affect anything"jongin learned that yoona is firm like that after many late night meetings, she doesn't let people affect her principles. "anyway, i have a performance on monday. you can come if you want to"he pretends to be aloof and his eyes are not looking at hers and somehow yoona finds the heat creeping to his cheeks adorable.

"aww, you are so uncool jongin"she pinch both of his cheeks in adoration and he blushes even further"why would you be abashed over something like that?!you should see yourself blushing like crazy!"she coos adorably.

"shut up. i'm not used asking and inviting people okay?"he waves it off and rubs the back of his head in embarrassment. "they usually come on their own"

yoona scoffs at him and push his shoulder"oh god, the arrogance is too real with you"

he ignores her complain and suddenly remembers something that he feels he should point out"hey, how come you no longer get drunk these days by the way? how is it possible you were drunk only the first time we met?"jongin wonders about that as the atmosphere between them gets more and more comfortable and her hitting him(in a literal sense) with anything near her is nothing new.

she is grateful that jongin is too busy picking the song for his next dance piece, because if he sees her right now, he would be scolding and telling her how lying doesn't suit her"i just felt like getting so drunk i could pass out, you know"lies. im yoona just doesn't have the courage of facing him sober that day. she had hidden herself from him so long and she could not even face him with a little sanity for the first time.

im yoona is a mistery for him. he feels like he had met her somewhere but he could not seem to recollect a single memory of her. her name also doesn't ring a bell and it bothers him. it bothers him that he could possibly forget someone as great as im yoona.