'Till Death Do Us Part

Time Lost-Part 1;The Camden Files

     I stared at her pale features as she lay in the cold hospital room. Her face was emotionless and her body seemed almost lifeless. But then her chest would rise and fall and hope glistened inside of me. I ran my hand over her fingers as I held them ever so carefully. Then I looked at her stomach. Allowing a tear to fall because the bump that once held my second child was now gone.
      My nameless baby girl now lay in an incubator that enveloped her and her tiny features in the intensive care unit. My queen and my princess, two people I had let down.
      I'm furious with my father. How could he do such and inhumane thing. I'm glad they saved him. Now he can go rot in prison. He'll feel how I feel when every day he reminds me that I'm a waste of his precious oxygen. Then again, I never cared. But he hurt my innocent family. Now I cared. I remember Cade screaming out as if he had somehow felt his mother's and sister's pain when Teigan was shot. I can hear him even now crying as I shoved him into Kadeen's hands as I ran to the car to rush Teigan to the hospital.
    I remember her frightened green eyes that were highlighted when she felt the shot. How she tried to get herself to the car and did it in time. How she groaned before going completely unconscious.
   I remember the cold and heartlessness that radiated off of my so called father. I remember all the plans that ran through my head but all resulted in someone being hurt. I remember his wicked white smile. I remember Robyn and Will's alertness. I remembered how I was tense that morning. I remember every last detail of that dreadful day.
All of it.

    It hounded my sleep and my ability to function. I felt useless and worthless and absolutely helpless. That is the worse combination of feelings to feel all at once. Yet, I bloody felt it. The dreadful and awful feelings that I hated.

I felt it. I felt them.

   And it stung then and it stings now. This hospital is a menace. A week in this place and I already felt sick of it. My new year wasn't so happy. So much for expectations. I thought I got rid of those. Sadly, I was wrong.