Caged Bird

3

"Loki, what are you doing?

"I'm giving the people what they want."

"Does all this make you feel better?"

"It certainly doesn't make me feel worse."

"Cast enough illusions and you risk forgetting what is real."

"Precisely."

Loki has not moved from where he sits against the wall for far too long. At least this is how Jane sees it. She has never seen him anywhere else and the guards she speaks to say he spends most of his time rooted there. They are sure he must use the toilet, but it is not something they see.

She keeps talking to him. Thor told her, in illusion, he can hear others, even when he chooses to ignore them.

Years pass, and after a decade of visits during which he stays sitting beside the same wall without moving, Jane starts to wonder if he is alive or if this illusion is just in place to keep anyone from questioning what happens in the cell. But she persists, visiting at least once every time she is in Asgard. And then, finally, after twenty years, he looks towards her and meets her eyes. He does not smile, or speak, or even move his hands, but he nods once in goodbye. She tells Thor. Little as it may be, it is a breakthrough.

This is all he gives her, one nod so slight that she doubts anyone else notices it, for ten years. Then he is in a slightly different place. Nearer to the energy barrier that she stands so close to when she visits.

"'Morning, Loki. I know, we're running out of little stories. But I found this one about a guy named Finn MacCumhail that I think you might like."

Through the haze of whatever it is he is using to cloud his own vision of reality, he speaks to her, his voice barely a croak, "Why have you come?"

"Because I want to."

"Why only you?"

"If you're asking about Thor, it's because your father banned him from coming down here. Not me, though. So here I am."

"Ah."

"So am I really speaking to you or is this all an illusion?"

"I am here."

"And where are you? Or when? Or whatever?"

"In the gardens with Mother on my birthday."

"Ah. Gotcha. Would you like me to leave you alone?"

"No."

"Ok. But if I'm here, can you at least promise to eat a little? You're turning into a walking skeleton and it's really hard to see. You're starving yourself."

"I eat enough to stay alive."

"Barely."

"That is the point."

"I'm sorry. I wish I could make this easier. It's not like I really knew you, but you seemed like you could have been a really great guy."

"Thank you, I think."

"It is. Take care of yourself, Loki. I've never had a brother before, and I'd really like the one I do have to be alive next time I visit."

"You will come again?"

"I always do, don't I? Will I be able to convince you to be in the here and now when I do?"

"Not likely."

"OK. But I'll still be back."

He nods to her, as is now his habit, and she disappears up the stairs.

The next time she visits, he is still beside the barrier, his eyes closed, "Hey, Loki."

"Hello."

"Where are you this time?"

"Still in the gardens."

"Nice."

"It is."

"And am I talking to you or an illusion?"

"Illusion. But where would I go? I am here. I listen."

"I know. It's just weird to talk to somebody who isn't really there."

"Do you not have long range communication devices on your world?"

"Yep. Telephones. The internet. Skype. All kinds of great stuff."

"So it is no different than holography or whatever it is you have."

"Still. Kinda creepy."

"So eloquent."

"I'm just a walking bucket of eloquence. See me being all eloquent..."

He chuckles, "Have you nothing better to do than visit this dismal place?"

"Nope. Thor's on business. So I get to do whatever I want out of a whole slate of options I don't even know about. I don't want to get lost, so I come here."

"You've been coming here for some years."

"Thirty, actually."

"For one of your race, that is a long time indeed."

"Yep. I'm getting to be an old lady. But here I am, still kicking in my sixties."

"I heard your stories."

"Sorry they weren't something spectacular. I'm a terrible storyteller. And they're all I could remember."

"Thank you."

"You're welcome."

"Will you come again?"

"Yep. Same as always. Maybe one of these days, I'll actually have your full attention."

"Unlikely."

There is a commotion by the stairs and Fandral quickly comes to Jane, "We are having some trouble with a few of the men in this latest group of prisoners. I need you to leave, for your safety's sake."

She turns back to Loki, "I'll be back, I promise. Be good to yourself."

He watches her go from where he sits in the middle of the floor, his illusion's eyes also following her up the stairs. He does not trust her yet, unsure as to whether or not she is Thor or Odin's puppet. But he still hopes she means it when she promises to return.