The First Annual Hunger Games (Book 1)

4. Realizations

I wake up and keep my eyes closed. My bed feels so much softer than usual. And what am I wearing? I slide my fingers across the mattress reaching for Trinks, but she's not there. I sit up and open my eyes. The reaping. The train. The mentor. The food. The boy. The bed. The Capitol.

The hunger games.

It all comes soaring back to me. I run my hands down my face and get out of the bed. Even though I showered right before I went to sleep I decide to take another, it's so much better than how we clean ourselves at home. Who knows how many showers I'll have left?

When I'm done I pick something not too fancy to wear; black pants and a blue shirt that is unbelievably soft. Just as I finish changing there's a knock on the door.

"Good morning!" Tullis lets herself in. "I'm glad you're up, breakfast is ready."

I follow her to the dining car and take a seat at the table. A minute later Roxen comes in and sits next to me.

"Can you believe the beds here?" I ask him.

He laughs. "It was hard to get out of it."

The boy from last night serves us breakfast, along with a few other avoxes. He won't make eye contact, but I don't blame him, our circumstances aren't exactly ideal. He's a slave to the Capitol the rest of his life and I'm their entertainment for the rest of mine.

Rye comes in and sits across from me. Tullis motions for us to start eating. "So," Rye says, "We're going to reach the Capitol today. When we get there you will meet your stylists. They will seem odd to you, but they are trying to help you. Listen to them and do what they say."

"What are stylists exactly?" Roxen asks.

"They will be helping you with your image while you're in the Capitol. They'll design everything you wear for the parade, the interviews."

I put my fork down. "Parade? Interviews? What are we, some sort of freak show?"

She sighs. "I'm going to be blunt with you, Aldera. You no longer have a life. Everything you do and say now belongs to the Capitol, and if you don't do or say the right thing then it will be the last thing you do."

"Why don't they just kill me now?"

"Killing you is far from the worst thing they can do to you." As she says this I make eye-contact with the boy. She lowers her voice. "Not only will they hurt you, they will hurt your family and friends to get to you. If you do the wrong thing, your friend, the girl you volunteered for will die."

I put my head in my hands. "So we're already dead."

"What if we win?" Roxen asks. I look over to see a determined look in his eyes.

Rye bites her lip. "It's hard to say. They haven't said anything about what happens to the winner. You'll probably be sent back to your district and if you don't cause them any trouble maybe they won't either."

"Is that the best we can hope for? Surviving just to live a life in the shadows."

"Living a life in the shadows is how you survive."

I push my plate away from me and stand. "How long do we have?"

Rye gives me a sad look. "A couple hours until we arrive."

I leave the dining car and go to my room. I look around but there's nothing to do. There's a TV, but I wouldn't know how to work it if I tried. There's no books, no games, nothing else to pass the time. I go to a window, open up the curtains, and sit next to it.

The landscape flies by so quickly I can hardly get a good look at it. There's lots of green. Green trees, green plants, green grass. I stare at it for a while without really seeing.

I hear footsteps and turn around. It's the boy. I smile and gesture for him to sit. He hesitates, but then plops down next to me. We stare out the window in silence, but I guess he's always silent.

"I wish I was out there," I say. "Free."

Me too. He signs.

"How long have you... uh--"

Been an avox? A few months now. I don't keep track.

"How'd you learn sign language?" I shift my position so I'm looking straight at him.

Another avox. It's not allowed though. When they caught him, it wasn't pretty. They cut off his hands.

I put a hand to my mouth. "That's terrible."

He shrugs. It's not the worst thing I've seen.

"How did you become an avox? How'd you get caught, I mean."

He smiles. You want the whole backstory?

I shrug. "I've got time."

I was born in the Capitol, but my parents we're always traveling around the districts. When the war started they were asked to help the Capitol because they knew the districts so well. I turned sixteen and they expected me to go fight the war, but I'd seen the districts and the people in them were good people, I didn't want to fight them. I ran away to District 13. He pauses, I guess remembering what happened to them. District 13 was obliterated by the Capitol. I started fighting against the Capitol, aiding the Districts with all my knowledge just like my parents were doing for the other side. I foiled so many of their attacks, their plans. He takes a deep breath. My parents knew me very well, though. They set a trap and they knew they could catch me. He laughs, which actually sounds normal. I knew something was going to go wrong, but I still went for it.

After I was captured my parents came and lectured me. Then they decided to make me an avox so I could never ruin anything of theirs again. It makes sense that I'm not theirs anymore. He seems relieved to be rid of them.

"How do you do it, serve people all day and not have a life anymore?"

A sad look comes across his face as he ponders this. I don't really live with it. It's like I've just been dreaming and watching myself for the past few months. I've been wondering if it's even worth it to stay alive. But everything changed yesterday.

"What happened yesterday?" I ask cluelessly.

You were the first person to look at me like I was an actual human being since my capture. Even the other avoxes don't look at me like that. You opened my eyes, and, no offense, but I don't mean that in a romantic way. He bites his lip, trying to find the best way to explain. You are practically walking into your death and you're not scared or being rude or freaking out. Most people in your circumstance would have thrown me out of the room yesterday, but you didn't. You just wanted to talk to me.

I shrug, not knowing what to say. Then I remember something. "You never answered me about your name."

He shakes his head. I was wondering if you'd forget. I'm Talon.

"Talon," I repeat. "I'm Aldera."

He shakes my hand then stands. I have to go before they wonder where I am. I'll see you later, Aldera.

"Are you going to be uh... serving us in the Capitol too?" I stand and walk him to the door. He nods and smiles before leaving the room.

I sit on my bed, content with myself for making a friend. I hadn't really let myself talk to Roxen too much because I knew we'd be in the arena together. I didn't have to worry about that with Talon. The arena would just separate us, not turn us against each other. And I can handle that.

So what do you think? Is Aldera adjusting to the idea that she might not make it out of this? Or is she just fooling herself? And what about this guy Talon? Will he be a good or a bad thing for Aldera? Is it good to make friends if you're only going to lose them?