Chapter 22
Cheryl screwed her eyes tightly shut against the harsh morning light and groaned, pulling the bed covers further over her head. For a split second, she struggled to remember why her head hurt and her eyes burned but a quick glimpse at the empty vodka bottle lying beside the bed brought all the memories of the previous night rushing back at once. Holding Kimberley's hand as they walked the long, red carpet, dancing with Louis, leaving the table to have a photo taken only to return to the table to find her life had been turned upside down.
And she knew she had nobody to blame but herself.
Rolling over onto her back, her eyes adjusting slightly to the brightness of the room, she scanned the surrounding area for her phone, quickly locating it on her nightstand. She had left it there, she remembered, so that she would hear it ringing if Kimberley called her back but after the vast quantity of vodka she had consumed, she would have been lucky to wake up at all.
Flipping it open, she saw that she did indeed have a message and as she opened her inbox a familiar name appeared.
Simon
She groaned as she saw his name, not wanting to hear what he had to say as it would only make the previous nights events an even harsher reality. Opening the message; however, her frustration turned to guilt as she read his words.
Cheryl, I'm so sorry! I don't know what to say. I thought Kimberley knew about the offer and I never realised you weren't intending to take me up on it. I would never have opened my big mouth if I had! If there's anything I can do to fix this just call me. Sorry again. Simon x
As much as she would have liked to have someone else to blame, this wasn't Simon's fault and Cheryl knew it. He was obviously feeling bad about his part in the whole mess but he was hardly the villain of the piece.
Exhaling hard, Cheryl hit 'reply'.
Don't worry Simon. It's not your fault. I should have told you I wasn't taking the job and I definately should have told Kimberley about it in the first place. Anyway, she's not answering my calls so I'm going to go around there. I'll call you tomorrow ok? Chez x
As a report flashed up telling her that the message had been received by Simon, she flipped the phone shut again and threw it down onto the bed. Sighing, she ran her fingers roughly through her hair. She could have done with a few more hours sleep but, until she sorted things with Kim, she knew that wasn't likely. Making her way to her wardrobe she picked out the first thing that came to her hands before throwing her hair up in a messy ponytail. Grabbing her keys, she took a deep breath before slamming the front door behind her.
'No time like the present'
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"What are you doing here Cheryl?"
She had been crying too. Cheryl could tell. Her eyes were red and swollen and she was pale and tired looking. On a normal day the sight of her beautiful girlfriend obviously distraught like this would have broken her heart but, knowing that she was the one who had caused it; well, it was almost too much to bare, and Cheryl felt tears brimming her lower lids as she stood in front of her.
What are you doing here? What a stupid question!
Why the f*ck do ya think I'm here?! she wanted to scream. I love you! She felt it was quite obvious. But, knowing Kimberley as she did, she knew that she wouldn't be interested in the drama of it, and so, she wisely chose to remain calm.
"I came to apologise," she began, her voice much smaller than she had intended it to be. "You're not answering my calls"
"No, I'm not," the curt response came, and Cheryl was surprised at the coldness in Kimberley's voice. "Didn't you ever stop to think that that might mean that I don't want to speak to you?"
That wasn't a question.
Dropping her gaze to the floor, Cheryl bit her lip to stem her threatening tears. "I just thought...," she began but was interrupted mid-sentance.
"You just thought," Kimberley spat, "that you could come waltzing around here and stick out your bottom lip and everything would be fine! Well, it's not gonna happen Cheryl!"
"Kimberley I didn't..." she stammered, the whole little speech catching her completely off guard.
"You humiliated me last night"
Looking up to meet Kimberley's eyes, Cheryl saw the hurt and betrayal behind them and it was more than she could take as a few stray tears finally spilled down her cheek.
"I know," she sobbed, her emotions no longer under control, a stark contrast to the collectedness of her girlfriend. "I'm sorry baby. I really am. I just..."
"Cheryl!" Kimberley cut her off again in a slightly raised voice. "Don't! Don't stand there and try to justify this just because you had supposedly decided not to take the offer. The fact is you never told me about it when you know you should have. Frankly Cheryl, I'm sick of it"
"What do you mean 'sick of it'?" Cheryl quizzed, genuinely confused at the remark. "This is the first time anything like this has ever happened"
Looking slightly flustered at her own remark, Kimberley dismissed it. "Regardless Cheryl, it's not good enough and I can't be with someone who doesn't care enough about my feelings to share something as important as moving to America"
Cheryl fell into a stunned silence for a moment, her stomach sick and her heart pounding. "What are you saying Kimberley?" she asked quietly raising her eyes once more, pleading with her not to do what she thought she was about to do.
"I'm saying that it's over Cheryl. We're over"
The sick feeling in Cheryl's stomach almost doubled in that moment and it was all she could do not to throw up on the doorstep. "Kimberley
please don't do this," she begged "I made a mistake. I know that. Just please don't give up on us"
"I didn't give up on us Cheryl," she told her, her voice level but with a detecable note of disgust. "You threw us away. Now please just go"
Cheryl was just about to protest when the words she dreaded, words she hadn't heard since he had cheated, left the mouth of the one she never expected them too.
"I don't love you anymore"
The world seemed to slow down a little as the gravity of those words sank in and, before Cheryl knew what had happened, the front door was closed in her face. Slinking back to her car, she felt numb and sitting completely still in the front seat, silent tears continued to team down her face as she reached for her phone. It was answered after just two rings and the man on the other end didn't quite know what to say as he heard chocked sobs emerging through her voice. As it turned out, he didn't need to say much as Cheryl said it all.
"Simon, I need to see you. I've changed my mind"
