Limerence

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Unrequited love sucks. They hurt every single cell, nerve and muscle you have until you don't have anywhere that could possibly hurt anymore.

I have been crushing on Brenda Lee for almost four years now. She owned me the minute I laid my eyes on her. It was the first day of high school and she came in late carrying a small kitten with her. It turned out that she was late because she tried to save the kitten from falling off of a tree. Cute, right? And that was that, I was hooked then and there. Four years passed by with me never making a move, not that I don't want to but she has a boyfriend, Ray Nolan. They've been together for three years now. He's the star of the track and field varsity team of the school and I'm only one of the basketball player that haven't won a single game since the last two years. Frustrating.

I didn't even know that crushes can last this long but apparently, it can, if it's for Brenda Lee. She's the kind of girl that you want to take to meet your parents because they would absolutely adore her. She's the kind of girl that you will show your friends and brag, knowing that they will be jealous because she is everything that guys ever dream for but they can't have her. Her long straight black hair that falls perfectly, her small but perfect, chocolate eyes, her perfect height, her perfect teeth, her perfect laugh, her perfect grades, her perfect - okay I am going stop. I sound like a creepy stalker. But you get the idea, don't you? She's perfect in every single way. And I don't stand any chance, not when she's in a serious relationship with someone equally perfect.

You hear that sound? That's me banging my head on my locker. And my broken heart strings.

Okay, I'm stopping. It hurts like a little bitc-

"Hey man. You're early today. What's the occasion?" That's Levi Lancaster. He's my oldest friend in this school. And also the nicest person in this world if you feed him. I don't even know how he can stuffed seven tacos in his mouth without throwing up and still have the most built body in the entire school, despite not being an athlete or in any sports team. If I am not his friend, I will probably say that he is a very good looking, but I am, so he's ugly.

"Nothing." I replied and lied. Today is my AP History, and I have the same one with Brenda. Brenda is always early, so if I am early I can spend a longer time looking at her discreetly, like a creepy stalker. I know, I know. I'm an idiot.

"Okay then. Hey, Phil's throwing a party this weekend and he invited us. Wanna be my date?" Levi batting his eyelashes at me.

"Phil who?" I stuffed my books in my locker and took out the one needed for my class.

"Ottenberg. You know that freshman dude, who got into the football varsity team. He is that good but no one likes him because he's class A douche. And that is why he's throwing a party." Levi said casually. He's not on any sports team but he's the school's photographer and he got some fame of his own, being good looking and all, that's why he got invited to all these parties.

"I don't know man. Maybe." I sling my backpack on one shoulder, ready to leave Levi on his own. I have someone pretty to look at to, which is better than hearing all the gossips in our school.

"I'll take that as yes, you will come with me by the end of this week. Are you going- That's Ella. That godforsaken devil to ever grace this place. She is the living proof that beauty is pain. In the ass." He looked over my shoulder, frown etched on his forehead.

If I didn't know better, I would think that Levi like Ella. But he has a girlfriend, they have been going out for over a year now and Levi like her a lot. And Ella, well we have history together. The three of us were good friends back in middle school, but during high school, at the end freshman year, Ella told me he liked me but I was and still am whipped by Brenda so I rejected her. Giving her a full blown speech about how we are friends and us going out will ruin the balance.

She told me she can't be just friend with me and left our little circle. It took a whole year for us to be civil again but it's different now. It's like we act civil just for the sake of it. I don't know if she still like me or she not. We never touch the subject anymore.

I looked behind me and saw that feisty girl with her shoulder-length auburn hair walking through the hallway, wearing a large Queen shirt she is so in love with and a pair of black ripped jeans. She's pretty you know, if you like girl with strong opinion and the ability to knock off your teeth in one blow, but she's just not my type. My type is Brenda Lee with her demure self and feminine features. Someone you feel like you can protect.

Ella Wilson is as plain as her name sounds. She knows how to stand up for herself, always have the right answer to everything, speaks her mind so loudly, so sarcastic and deadly smart. She's the epitome of a girl that you should never messed with to begin with. Maybe that's why she is not my type.

"Hello Levi, River." She nods at the both of us like we are peasants. Smirking as she saw Levi's reaction to her presence. I just smile at her.

"Ella. Nice to see you here. Although your absence showed some light at the end of the tunnel for us seniors." Levi grin widely, provoking Ella. He should not though. Ella will leave him with his ego broken.

"Well the light better be fricking brighter than your future and the rest of the seniors'. Excuse me boys, I have places more important to be. Enjoy your senior year." Ella walked past us like the queen she is and never even looking back. Her ass looks good in those jeans, if only the t-shirt doesn't cover as much.

What? I am a dude. I can enjoy other asses even though I am madly in crush with Brenda.

"I hope you rot in hell Ella Wilson!" Levi yelled at Ella's back.

"Well after you Levi Jenkins." She yelled back and didn't even bother to spare us mere mortals a glance.

"I hate her." Levi looked like he might cry.

"Nope. You don't dude. You will gladly punch anyone who's messing with her. And that's the truth." It is. We were friends once. And I am pretty sure if anyone messes with her, we will back her up even if she can handle herself pretty well. That's friendship.

"Well I hate you River."

"You hope you do. I have class in 10 minutes. See you." I practically sprint from my locker to my class.

And there she is, in all her glory. Brenda Lee. Sitting at her table, her hair swept on side, revealing that pretty neckline.

Now, if you'll excuse me while I stare at her until the end of the class and break my heart all over again knowing that I will never have her.

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Love,

EMA.