apple of my eyes | k.junhoe [completed]

Chapter 16

"Ah Koo Ara... why are you so unlucky?" I said to myself as I came out of the school and it was raining yet again. I stayed late at school that night as I have to finish a project. It was already 10 pm and it was really dark outside compared to the others day. I was going to wait until the rain stopped as I didn't bring my umbrella with me but it didn't look like it was going to stop raining anytime soon.

I decided to wait but then again I was too scared to wait alone and seeing that one by one, they were leaving. I didn't have a choice but to leave as well, there was no question that I would stay at school alone at night by myself. I was not fearless, not at all. Especially in the dark and at a school, there was no way, so I just decided to run off in the rain instead.

But I stopped mid way and changed my mind yet again, I just remembered a scene from the horror movie I watched with Junhwe not long ago. It was raining in the movie and the girl was left alone too. I started to visualize the movie in my head and it freaked me out even more. And while I was thinking about that, a hand suddenly grabbed my shoulder so I just screamed and turned around.

But I realised that I got scared for nothing as it was only my brother. He covered me with the umbrella and stared at me worriedly. I just sighed in relief, I thought it was the end of me just then. But it was kind of funny that the person that I mentally called for when I got scared actually appeared. I just smiled at him but Junhwe just looked at me not so amused.

"Don't you know it's a rainy season? Who do you always forget your umbrella?" Junhwe scolded me and I just rolled my eyes at him and started walking. He quickly followed me as he had to hold the umbrella for me. But still he kept on complaining about me staying late at school, so wanting to stop him from nagging, I just changed the subject.

"Oppa! Do you remember the first time we met?" I asked him as we walked home together. Junhwe just smiled as he remembered. I think we both remembered that day quite well as it wasn't really a day that we could easily forget, especially for Junhwe. But for me, it was special too, it was the day I got myself a brother.

"Yes, it was raining just like this." Junhwe said calmly and I just pulled him closer to me as he talked because I noticed that his shoulder was wet from the rain. He was too scared that I got wet but half of his body was already soaking wet. I just smiled at him and he just took a glance at me and stared elsewhere, avoiding eye contact.

"Honestly, I hated you back then..." I admitted something and chuckled a little. It was the truth, I didn't like him that much at the beginning as I felt like he came in between me and my parents. But that wasn't the case, it was actually because of him that I had such a good childhood and probably also because of him that I became the person I am today.

"I know~" Junhwe commented and laughed a little. Of course he knew, it was quite obvious actually. And for a quick witted person like him, he caught on things pretty fast, just like when I hated him. Just like when I loved him and just like at this moment... when I was completely in love with him. He was aware of all of that.

"Do you remember the time we went to the pool?" Junhwe suddenly asked me as we walked pass a public pool. I felt like my cheeks were red as I remembered that moment. It was really embarrassing, I didn't want to think about it. I couldn't believe I made a fool of myself back then. Seeing my fluttered face, Junhwe just started laughing.

I really love water, I love it since I was little but I wasn't a really good swimmer back then and now, I still sucked. I didn't know why but I just begged my dad to bring us to the pool back then, I also learnt that Junhwe didn't know how to swim and he was afraid of water from there too. I guessed I wanted to show off so I just went to the deeper part of the pool. It was fine until I got a bad crump and almost drown.

"But why did you jump in the pool back then?"I remembered what happened and I suddenly got curious. I realised that I never knew the reason why Junhwe jumped into the pool back then. I couldn't understand because he feared water and he didn't know how to swim. I asked him curiously but Junhwe just looked down and smiled shyly. It was like the first time I have seen him smiled that way.

"I'm not sure myself." Junhwe just laughed a little and I just laughed along with him. It was funny now that I thought about it. It was already hard enough for the lifeguard to save a drowning kid but another kid that didn't know how to swim just jumped in, doubled the trouble. I was laughing by myself but what Junhwe said next caught me off guard.

"I think that was when I first started to like you. I know I was going to get swallowed by water but I thought that I have to save you."Junhwe admitted and I knew he was being honest. I could tell, he wasn't the type to just say something he didn't mean. I just smiled a little by myself hearing those words from him.

"You weren't really saving me though." I stated a fact and we both just laughed out loud because it was true. I just stared at Junhwe while we were laughing and his smile was breathtaking, how come I never notice that after living with him for so long? Maybe it was because I was always too shy to even stare at him directly. And suddenly something came to my head.

"But oppa... your first love?" I said, hesitating a little. I remembered him saying something about his first love from elementary school. But didn't he say he like me since back then? Then what was the thing with his first love? I knew it was something from years ago but I was still curious, I still wanted to know. And hearing that, Junhwe just let out a little chuckle. He nodded his head, admitting that it was me.

"That's right... it's you. The girl that I have a one sided love for was you. You are my first love. .. Well it's not like I have any other love either." He mumbled the last part but I could still hear him and understood every word he said very clearly. I couldn't help but smiled at those sweet words. I never thought Junhwe felt that way towards me. He was so good at hiding his feeling. It wasn't because I was oblivious, I swear.

"Why didn't you tell me back then..." I stared at him and asked him curiously. I wondered why he didn't tell me. Was it because we were too young? If he told me back then maybe we didn't have to be in such a complicated relationship like this. It was because we both hid our feeling that was why we were in pain like this. If only one of us made a first move back then...

"It was because the day I gathered my courage and wanted to tell you... you were facing like 10 kids alone by yourself. They were the kids that always made fun of you for not having friends. But instead of crying, you just firmly told them that you didn't need any friend... that you have me as your oppa who will always stay by your side and takes care of you forever." Junhwe told me the situation and I actually recalled that moment, so I just smiled a little. I did say those words and I did mean it. I only need Junhwe in my life. It was like that back then, and it was still like that at this moment.

"And hearing what you said... I felt like I should put an end to my feeling. Because the only way I can stay with you forever is not being your lover but being a brother that will take care of you. But I guess the more I see you, the more we grow up, the more my feeling for you grows. Do you even know how many times a day I asked myself what kind of person should I be to you? And in the end, the answer is always the same. I'll be a brother that will stay by your side and protect you." I just stared at Junhwe and I knew that we were feeling the same way. At that moment we were both scared of losing each other. If I date him, I felt like I was going to lose a brother. If he dates me, he felt like he was going to lose a sister.

What do we do?

"But Ara, i'm not going to give up on you." He said silently, making me flinch.

Is he saying that he wants me not only as a sister ?

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