Don't Remind Me (A Junjou Romantica Fanfiction)

Chapter 1

 It wasn't fair something like that could happen to me. The close supervision of Usagi made it almost impossible for anyone to get close to me. I was somewhat being controlled, but in the end, I wasn't so bothered.

Tension built up in my shoulders.

I didn't want Usagi to find out what happened, but I knew there was no way around it. To keep him in the dark would be torturous and cruel. It wouldn't be honest and keeping secrets from him isn't something I want to do.

It was raining down hard, soaking my clothes. I was aching all over, trying so hard to walk without a limp in my gate. It was almost midnight and Usagi was probably worried sick about me since I wasn't answering my phone. Going inside that house would require a great deal of courage on my part, considering the complete wimp I am. I could spend the night at my brother's house, but I didn't want him to know either. I could sleep on the streets...

I slapped myself in frustration.

I'm not going to avoid this. I won't. How horrible will it really be? Will Usagi still love me even if my body is soiled?

"It's going to be okay," I reassured myself, my voice shaking uncontrollably, "There's no need to worry. It's all over anyhow."

After a good thirty minutes, I was at the front door. I found it unlocked and let myself inside.

My heart started pumping harder.

Maybe I can slip past him and go to bed right away.

I held in my breath as I removed my shoes in the darkness. It was quiet inside, the lights were out. I saw his bedroom door was open ajar, so I figured he was already sleeping. I wondered if he was worried about me or not.

In my wet socks, I began up the stairs to my room, wishing for my footsteps to be quieter.

"Where've you been?" Usagi switched on the lamp from below me, where he had been waiting on the couch, "You didn't answer your phone."

I stopped in my tracks and gripped the hand railing harder. I paused, my heart pounding against my chest. It hurt so bad. The moment I felt tears well in my eyes once again, I hurried up the staircase into my room. Throwing the covers over myself, I curled up into a ball in my sopping wet clothes.

Oh Jesus, please.

The wind whistled at the window, rain plummeting down on its glass pane. No light could get passed these covers pulled tightly over my head. A lump formed in my throat, making my nervousness worsen.

"Misaki, tell me what happened." Usagi voice came from in front of me, he was refraining from touching me, which was unusual for him and I couldn't comprehend why. He kneeled down beside my bed and lifting the covers ever so slightly, closing the space between our faces. I could feel his presence inches from me from the warmth his breath created. One of his large, cold hands landed on my head as he tried comforting me.

I shuddered, "Don't touch me!" I cried harder in anger and fear.

He turned on the lamp beside my bed, hoping to coax me into cooperating with him, "Please, let me know what happened."

The sobbing continued on as I ignored him.

I wasn't ready for something like this. Why do bad things decide to occur one day and turn your life around?

He slowly pulled the covers back and pulled my hands from my face. I kept my eyes tightly shut, but I knew he was studying my bruised and blackened face.

"Did someone hit you?" Usagi asked me using a more sincere tone to his voice. He pressed two fingers onto my collarbone, "These here aren't bruises."

I trembled harder, hoping Usagi figured it out without me having to say it out loud.

What a terrible world this is.