Mya's Choice

Mya's Choice - Chapter 13

“Are you okay?” He asked.

“Yea I’m fine,” I told him.” I should go inside.” I said as I motioned to the classroom. I just really needed to not be around him right now.

“Yea, I’ll see you later,” He said before leaning in to kiss me. I pulled away. I don’t know what made me, but I just did. It was like some sort of reflex.

“What’s wrong?” He asked.

“I think I’m coming down with something.” I lied. “I’ll see you later okay,” I said before pecking him on the cheek and going inside the class.

I shook my head trying to unscramble my thoughts. What the hell was wrong with me? I couldn’t just start pulling away from him like that. I mean he was my boyfriend. I really needed to get my shit together, because I knew that Josh would definitely start questioning my answers and he had always been a problem solver so I knew that he was going to figure out that something was going on.

I sighed and placed my forehead on the cold hard desk. I needed to keep away from Josh. I couldn’t be with two guys at the same time. It just wasn’t right. I would be considered a whore. I knew that we were in two different times, but that still didn’t help how I felt on the inside.

I felt bad for doing this to Josh, because it felt like I was doing it behind his back which I was, but It just wasn’t the same situation as anybody else’s. I lamely lifted my head from the desk and began paying attention to the lecture. I would think about all this at another time. Right now I should be focusing on school. I groaned. Who was I kidding? I couldn’t focus on schoolwork if I wanted to.

I sat down at my usual lunch table waiting for Josh. I knew that he would want to talk about whatever happened this morning but to be honest. I really didn’t want to talk to him about it. I just wanted to talk about a more cheerful subject, something that wouldn’t bring up the guilt that was resting in the pit of my stomach.

Josh sat down across from me at the table, but no one else came. “Where’s your friends?” I asked him.

“They’re not sitting with us today.” He replied.

“Why not?” I questioned.

“Because I asked them not too.” I looked at him curiously telling him to explain. “We need to talk Mya.” He said before taking a swig of his drink. I looked off to the side and stared at a group of teenagers at a nearby table.

“Mya,” he called out. “Why are you ignoring me?” He asked.

“I wasn’t ignoring you. I’m just waiting for you to talk.” I told him.

“Why’d you pull away from me this morning?” He inquired.

“I told you! I think I’m getting sick.” I lied once again.

“That’s bullshit and you and I both know it.” He replied.

“What’s going on?” he asked.

“Nothing Tr--- Josh.” I said correcting myself. “I’m just tired,” I lied for the third time today.

“I don’t believe you,” He said.

“Well then don’t, I guess that ends this conversation.” I replied getting defensive. I hated being constantly questioned when I didn’t want to talk about things and he knew that.

“What if I don’t want to end the conversation?” He questioned.

“Well that’s too bad because I’m done with it.”

“Whatever I don’t have time for this!” He stated.

“Time for what? Me?” I challenged.

“You and your bullshit.” He replied.

“I don’t’ come with bullshit Josh,”

“Mya you are still in fucking love with your dead boyfriend.” I looked at him stunned. Did he really just say that? How did he know? He must have saw the truth in my face or took my silence as confirmation.

“Why are you with me?” He asked.

“J-J-Josh…..I-I’m not-----“ I begun.

“Don’t lie Mya, you just almost called me by his name.” He stated. I hung my head low.

“I’ll see you around My,” he said as he got up from the table.

“Josh wait,” I called out.

“For what? For you to get over him. It’s been a year Mya, what do you expect me to do?” He asked.

“Josh just calm down.” I pleaded. “Don’t be mad.”

“I’m not mad,” he replied.

“I’m sorry,” I told him. He looked at me and then walked away. I buried my face in my hands. This whole time traveling thing was causing me to go insane. It was taking its toll on me and putting a heavy burden on my shoulder.

I collected myself and rose from the table making my way towards the parking lot. I didn’t feel like being at school any longer. I knew that all these missed and skipped days were going to catch up with me, but I just couldn’t stand being here any longer. I wanted to go home. I wanted to be with Trey.