Kris grabbed on to Caleb’s arm. He stopped and looked down at her. She responded with a glare. This was the first time she’d ever actually glared at him. She was always playing pranks on people and being an indomitable ball of happiness. He didn’t think she was capable of doing so.
“Caleb, I don’t know what’s up with you, but I don’t like your attitude,” she said after looking at him for a while. She was feeling a strange mixture of hurt and fury.
“Then bugger off and you won’t have to deal with it,” he snapped. Her hands tightened on his arm slightly.
“Caleb, what’s wrong?” she asked him in a softer voice. He was reluctant to accept into their group. She never expected him to lash out at her for no apparent reason.
Caleb looked down at her again. He’d detected the hurt in her voice. He didn’t like it or the guilt tugging at the corners his heart. “You’re not Chloe. What makes you think you could replace her? You’ll never be her,” he bit out.
“But Caleb, I’m not-” she started saying before he interrupted her.
“Don’t even try. With your guitar skills and happy-go-lucky attitude, you’re so similar to her that everyone loves you. Well, here’s a newsflash, Kristi,” he sneered. “I don’t even like you.”
The words hit Kris like a stab to the heart. Her throat started to burn as she fought tears. She couldn’t even bring herself to look at him. She knew the tears would spill if she did.
We came here for snacks, she reminded herself. Even though she was there to help him, there were others who needed a friend too. She had to be strong for them. She nodded subtly to let him know she heard him and stalked off to the candy aisle.
She didn’t wait up for him. He had to run after her when he realized she wouldn’t stop. Once he caught up with her, he slowed down. He even took pleasure in watching her speed up in order to keep with him.
The walk back to church was full of painful silence. Kris spent all of it asking God why He’d put her there.
God, she prayed. He doesn’t even like me. How can I help him? I don’t want to give him a reason to hate. Maybe I should just leave him.
God answered. That’s not what I told you to do, is it?
Well, no, but-, she said before He stopped her.
No buts, Kristi. Be still and know that I am God. Do what I say and I will take care of the rest.
Yessir, she said as she entered the building behind the church that they normally used for their youth meetings. Matt was waiting for them with Liz and a bunch of other teens that were part of the group.
“What took you so long?” Matt asked. Caleb shrugged, but Kristi smiled at Matt and pulled a pack of cherry Twizzlers out of the shopping bags she carried.
“I know you don’t like marshmallows, but I know these are your favorite,” she said, handing the pack of red candy to him. Kristi did this with everyone in the room, saying something similar. Well, everyone except Caleb.
She finally got to him and hesitated. “I heard marshmallows are your favorite,” she said holding up a bag of marshmallows- and his favorite brand, too.
“Thanks,” he murmured, taking it from her. He watched as she went to the circle of chair they always set up for the group meetings. He knew she had something planned, and still he wasn’t prepared to hear he call everyone to the circle. He stayed behind to see what she’d do.
Kris felt nervous. It was the first time she’d ever stood in front of a bunch of people to talk to them. Play guitar? Dozens of times. Give speeches? Zilch. She looked over at Matt and Liz. They both smiled encouragingly at her. She drew in a deep breath. Everyone was looking at her expectantly. Here goes nothing, she thought.
“I’m sure y’all can see the candy in your hands. From what I gathered, they’re your favorites. So, please, dig in!” she said.
One of the younger girls spoke up. “What about you?” she asked.
“Those were all mine,” Kris replied. People started mumbling, offering to give the candy back to her. She waved her hand. “No, no, no. You don’t need to give it back. Besides, consider it a gift from a friend - which leads me to what I want to talk about today.
“Friends are the people, who besides your family, love you the most. They’ll be there to catch you when you fall. They’ll be there to help you grow. Essentially, they should be there through it all.
“Jesus is the best friend of all. He loves you more than everyone else put together. The cross is proof. He also gave you the best gift ever – grace.
“Grace isn’t a gift He gives us on our birthdays. It’s something He gave us because He loves and appreciates us. All we need to do is ask for it.
“You see, that’s the beauty of Grace. Everyone can receive it, but there are those who haven’t heard of it. Can you imagine not hearing of something so great like Grace?
“The candy I gave you tonight is like Grace. I gave it to you because I care about all of you. That’s what we tend to do, right? Give people we appreciate gifts. You’d probably tell people you love about Grace. That’s what I want you to do tonight. Share you candy with people that have been a great influence in your life – just to show your gratitude.”
She let out a breath. That wasn’t so bad. People from all corners of the room came to speak to her afterwards. Some even gave her some of their candy. The one that stuck out the most to her was Kayla, the new girl. She’d recently become Christian and she was already struggling.
“I want to thank you for reminding me that I’ll never be alone. I think I needed to be reminded that I’ll always have God’s grace, so this is to show you my appreciation in advance for becoming one of my closest friends,” she said as she gave Kris her entire pack of M&Ms.
Tears filled Kris’s eyes. “Kayla, I think many of us needed to be reminded of the great friend we have in Jesus.”
She thought of how Caleb turned on her. It felt unfair, especially because she thought of him as her closest friend.
“That’s because He’s forced to be your friend and He’s your only one too,” said the main passenger of her train of thought.
Kayla – bless her heart – stood up for Kris. “That’s not true! She has me!”
Caleb snorted. “Yeah? And that’s because she’s the only one that would be friends with a cutter. Tell me… have your scars healed from your last time?” he asked.
Unlike Kris, Kayla couldn’t control herself when Caleb’s words hit home. Tears covered her cheeks as sobs shook her frame. Noticing the furor, people started looking at them, curious to see what was happening.
“Kayla, c’mon. Don’t listen to him. I can assure you that a real friend won’t judge you for what you’ve done,” Kris whispered soothingly.
Kayla looked at her forlornly. “He’s right. This isn’t the right place for someone like me,” she said before running out.
Kris glared at Caleb once Kayla was out of sight. “What is your problem? You don’t know what she’s going through. She’s doing something about it. You didn’t –“ she started to say before she cut herself off. It wasn’t right to bring up things people struggle with. He might have done it, but she wouldn’t.
Caleb, however, knew what she was going to say. “I didn’t what? I didn’t try to overcome it? Is that what you’re telling me? You think I haven’t tried to forget it all ever happened? Your damned presence is a reminder of everything! I’ve tried but you just don’t get out of my face. Can’t you just go away?” he snapped angrily.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it that way. I know you tried to fight it. I know it was hard,” she whispered, trying to placate him.
“Shut up! You don’t! Your life is beyond perfect. You know nothing about pain and loss!”
You know nothing, she wanted to say, but she couldn’t bring herself to say a thing. She didn’t want people to pity her. She knew all about pain and loss. Of course, she did. They used to be her constant companions. She looked around to see all eyes on her. Liz caught her eye. Kris nearly broke under the weight of Liz’s sympathetic gaze. Fighting back tears, she murmured, “I’m going to find Kayla. She wouldn’t want to miss this. Don’t wait for us, okay?”
