My Best Friend (BoyxBoy)

Chapter 16

*Lucas's POV*

Fuck. God why didn't I come out when he wanted me to? If I had I wouldn't be sitting here, trying not to cry, in the back of the library.

It's after school and ever since I talked to Ben in the library, I've been a mess. God I miss him so much, but he wouldn't have even let me tell him. He thinks I actually want Sommer? After what we had, I've learned I don't want anyone other then Ben. He doesn't seem to feel that way though, I mean he went out and got another boyfriend for christ sakes. And here I was thinking that I'd have a chance to get him back. I just thought that, that he would be waiting for me to come in and fix everything. I didn't think he'd throw away the best relationship I know I've ever had. Well clearly I thought wrong.

"Hey are you alright? Oh hi, Lucas...," I hear a voice say.

I look up to see Ben's boyfriend, I think his name was Nathan, standing at the table.

"It's Nathan, from lunch? Um I'm-"

"I know who you are," I snarl, "You're the one who took the only boy I ever loved away from me." I'm surprised that I admitted that so easily, but it's true. I love Ben and he's the one who has Ben. So therefore he took him away from me. I know that's sort of flawed thinking, but I'm not thinking rationally right now.

"What do you mean I took him away from you? He told me that you cheated on him with some girl and that you weren't together anymore. I didn't steal anyone away from anyone," he says indignantly.

I cast my eyes down at the table, not wanting him to see the tears welling in my eyes. "Yeah well you can tell him that I didn't cheat on him. It was something that was going on before Ben and since I never came out no one ever knew I was with Ben. I loved- love him. I would never cheat on him, believe me. But he won't listen to me or let me explain and now he's with you. So I guess it's the end of my chapter with Ben," that's it, at those words my tears fall, staining my paper with big wet drops.

"Lucas..." He trails off, not knowing what to say. I mean what do you say to your boyfriend's crying ex? "Um Lucas, I feel terrible. I didn't, I didn't know..."

I get up, gathering my stuff. "Well you may feel terrible, but it's too late. Ben's happy again and I don't want to be the one to ruin that. Especially if I was the one who hurt him the first time. So I wish you guys the best... Now I have to go," I say, turning to leave.

As I'm leaving I wonder briefly if he'll follow me to say something. But as I walk out to my car, I realize that that would be pointless. I mean what else would the boyfriend of my ex have to say to me? I was telling the truth when I said I didn't want him to break up with Ben. If Ben got the relationship he wanted with Nathan.. Well then I'd just have to let him be happy. That starts my tears up again and so I pull into a random parking lot and just sit in my car and cry. After a few minutes of feeling sorry for myself I pick up my phone and punch in Tristan's number.

"It's a mess Tris, he's with Nathan and he's happy. I screwed up his happiness once, I won't do it again. We came up with that whole plan and we won't even be able to use it," I explain after he picks up.

"Luke? Calm down and think about this. Who does Nathan, that's his name right? Yeah? Ok. Who does this Nathan look like?" he asks me.

"Well.." I think for a minute. "Well he kinda looks like me I guess. But what does that have anything to do with anything?"