Revenge of the Luna Queen

Chapter 28

"Aislinn I can fix this." He watched her back stiffen before slumping weakly, looking at her he amended his words. "We- we can fix this. Aislinn please, you can't give up on me. I was only trying to protect you. You are my life, you have to understand that. Believe that."

She didn't look at him, "Did you forget that you were mine?"

"Aislinn" His touch was soft as he turned her, his hands light on her shoulders. She felt so delicate in his grasp, nothing but a whisper of glass and bone, like a bird. So easily crushed by his heavy hands. He stared down at her. His wolf whimpering in his mind, his agonized cries and anger only intensifying as his fears were confirmed. Inhaling Kaiden shuddered to find her scent also changed. Gone was the undercurrent of their pack, the scent of him, even of her own wolf. There was now an emptiness to her scent, which smelled of nothing but car fumes, a hint of soap, detergent, blood and dirt.

"You lost me anyway Kaiden." She said without malice, only deep sadness.

It had started when they had re-entered Silverblood territory. The aching emptiness, the loneliness and loss pulsing louder and louder. She had tried to ignore it at the beginning. Focusing on her anger, on the others, and on what they had learned. But as the night had worn on and she had fallen quieter and quieter. She knew the others had noticed, that they had brushed it off as mere exhaustion.

But it wasn't. Being back in her homeland, her mate standing in front of her and her pack around her had fueled the darkness which had taken up residence in her chest. It pulsed and grew, fueled by the silent emptiness, the distance and hollowness, where there should have been wholeness, warmth, companionship and love.

She was dying, unable to survive with only half of herself. Her spirit, mind and heart, broken and damaged.

"Don't say that." Kaiden growled, bowing his head so his forehead rested against hers. His hands cupping her face refusing to let her back away from him. Refusing to let her go.

"It's the truth."

"We will fix this." He said with absolute conviction.

With reluctance she broke his hold, twisting away from his warmth, turning back to the windows. "Maybe I don't want to." She said quietly.

"Don't!" Kaiden roared his voice shaking with anger. "Don't you ever say that. Aislinn, you are not giving up. I almost lost you once, I will not let it happen again."

"So what now Kaiden? Are you going to command me to live? Lock me in a tower and force Richard to find a way to bend me once again to your wishes?" There was no heat in her voice, she was too empty to even try and stir up anything but sadness at what he had done. She was sick of being angry, of hating the world, of being consumed with rage.

"Aislinn it wasn't like that."

"Then tell me Kaiden, what was it like? What do you want to call it?" She asked wearily, a shiver racking over her body. She hugged her arms tighter around herself.

"I was trying to protect you."

Aislinn let out a sigh, she knew she could hurt him, could hurl that back in his face and break him, but what was the point? Would it change anything that had happened? Would making him hurt, as she had been hurt, really make her feel better? Sighing again she said, "I know Kade. I know."

"Aislinn we will get through this."

"I want to be alone now." She replied, and could feel as he stiffened, hurt flaring in him.

"I want to stay with you."

"You are needed downstairs, Kade. If Rainer is correct; the Rogues, the council and the Packs will be here tomorrow. Plus there's nothing you can do here."

"Aislinn stop talking like you're giving up."

"You're King now, my pack is returned, and tomorrow you will face those responsible and make them pay."

"I swear it on my life. They will die or I will."

"Then what's left, hmm? That's all I ever wanted."

"What about me?" Kaiden asked quietly.

Aislinn felt tears well in her eyes, the hole in her center throbbing as heartbreak and pain spread. "What about you Kade?"

"You would leave me? You would give up on me?"

Aislinn flinched, her breath shuddering. "I want to be alone."

.

.

Aislinn had been here before. Too many times in fact. This space of in-between. This floating abyss on the cusp of nothingness, and the edge of everything.

So many times, she had dragged herself back. So many times, she had thought she was too broken. Too weak. Too tired to go on.

And yet, each time she would muster her courage, her energy, her heart, and would pull herself back once more. She would re-forge the broken, piece together the shattered, and try to heal the twisted blackened form she had become.

She stared out the window as the world burned.