thin ⚣ phan

three

as he closed the door behind him, he heard footsteps and then he's mother was standing in front of him with a worried expression on here face

"dan where have you been?"

"i went out to hang out with some friends"

friends. as if dan had any but he couldn't tell his mother that. besides it shouldn't matter if he did or did not anyways.

the shock and awe mixed on her face grew until a crescent lit up her face as if the sun were on the other side of her sparkling teeth. dan's mother was smiling, something that rarely occured.

dan smiled back.

"dan that's amazing you should have brought them home..oh i could have made cookies-" he stopped her and pulled her into a hug.

dan completly forgot about everything for once he wasn't worried about how many calories. he felt okay just okay at a point while dan was hugging his mother he had almost forgotten about the battle he had with food, almost.

his mother let go and then asked,"dan are you hungry?"

"no.. i already ate" he said as he shifted his eyes in different directions bexause he knew if he looked at his mother she would know he was lying.

"are you sure?"

no no no no i'm not sure at this point i don't know. i'm supposed to love food like a normal person, i'm supposed to eat it without wanting to vomit but that's not me i'm not normal. not normal at all, he thought.

"yes i'm sure but thanks mom" dan let out a slight grin, slight as he headed upstairs.

bathroom. dan headed there first he didn't feel like going to his room he didn't feel safe there he just didn't feel like doing anything he wanted to sit in silence.

breathe just breathe he reminded himself. it wasn't long till the voices came back though, get up fatass go do what you have to do.

the scale. dan was terrified of having to step on the scale because he knew the number he was going to face on the scale would affect him even if he didn't want it to.

103. dan had gained a pound a pound because he had consumed all those calories, that's when dan lost it he cried as he starred into the mirror pointing out all his flaws.

dan felt dizzy he didn't feel okay everything was happening too fast he just wanted to be okay why was this happening why am i thinking so much just breathe, he thought.

dan didn't notice when that he was crying, dan didn't notice his mom telling him he was going to be okay  and holding his hand as he was being taken into an ambulance, all dan was capable of seeing were blue and red lights and then everything went pitch black.